I AM ON THE BRINK OF LOSING IT.
I am filled with rage and sadness, and it doesn’t help that news reports continue to come out about the ineptitude, greed and egocentricity that characterizes our president and his administration's response to COVID-19. And yet, I still have to make my way through the day, along with everyone else. We’re baking bread, we’re learning how to sew our own medical masks and we’re watching upsetting documentaries about people who abuse animals and each other. Thankfully, too, there are livestreams of musicians who take time out of their day — during which they’re probably also just trying to get by — to sing songs that comfort and calm our hearts.
On Friday, via the Instagram account of the French site La Blogothèque, Soccer Mommy chief Sophie Allison took her turn. Her new album Color Theory (released what feels like a lifetime ago on Feb. 28 via Loma Vista) is unintentionally the perfect record for a pandemic. Much of it is about the reality of struggling with mental illness, and anyone who’s dealt with anxiety or depression knows that both of those monsters can feel just as isolating and ground-shaking as life in quarantine.
Allison started her four-song acoustic set with a version of Color Theory’s opener, “Bloodstream.” The fluid, midtempo number drips with nostalgic haze as Allison looks back on the warm and happy summer days of her childhood. As the song progresses, she reveals that she calls up these sun-drenched memories to hide from the depression she's been living with since she was very young — something she can see clearly in hindsight as an adult.
“This next song is also kind of about staying inside,” she said, introducing “Circle the Drain.” While she is again referring to depression in the song, it’s nearly impossible to not respond to the lyrics in light of the strange new reality we're living through. As she sang: “I’m trying to seem strong for my love / For my family and friends / But I’m so tired of faking / ’Cause I’m chained to my bed when they’re gone / Watching TV alone / ‘Til my body starts aching.”
Allison rounded out the set with the Color Theory track “Royal Screwup” and a slow, haunting version of The Cars' “Drive” that brought to mind the treatment she gave The Boss' "I’m on Fire." Between songs, she answered fans’ questions from the live chat about everything from her Color Theory songwriting process (“I played guitar, and I liked some chords, and then I just started singing — can’t make it a science for me”) to her favorite Nintendo Switch games (Stardew Valley is a favorite, though she also likes the new Animal Crossing). Honestly, it was nice to be reminded that we can still like stuff and not feel guilty about it.
A few other things we learned:
- Allison is an Aquarius moon.
- Her favorite guitar is her purple Novo that’s engraved with the phrase “Gemini Bitch.”
- She really likes Thai food.
- The name “Soccer Mommy” was her Twitter handle before it was her stage name.
- She has a purple toothbrush.
- Her favorite tuning is open A.
- She loves pecan pie.
- Spike, Faith and Tara are her favorite Buffy characters.
- She played saxophone in the school band.
- She’s spending her days in quarantine by reading The Bell Jar, watching The Sopranos and recording demos.
- Said demos are her favorite material she’s written so far.
We won’t hear the new songs anytime soon, Allison says, since she just released Color Theory. But to know there’s new music coming, to know art is still being created, helps put a little hope in days that largely feel hopeless otherwise.
