#MourningInCancelvania vs. #GreaterOfTwoEvils
Whoa! What’s that sudden, tingly twitch that seems like it came out of nowhere? My grandma might say something like “a rabbit ran over my grave.” But I know what’s really going on: With the arrival of spooky season, Nashville’s fiendishly dedicated kayfabe kings of Halloween — Boo Dudes — once again stalk the land.
If you’ve been following along in your Heckronomicon, you’ll recall that last year Ghastly Mike Hackenslash was awaiting trial on charges of fraud and antiquity desecration. Still, bassmummy Jesse Boo miraculously managed to concoct a new collection called The Horrible Sounds of Boo Dudes with honorary lead vocalist Röngwulf. However, on Halloween Ghastly Mike, er, put himself down by scarfing chocolate, managing to fulfill the terms of his parole in the process.
Hackenslash has had centuries to get used to being undead; while the experience took a bit out of him, with a visit to the pet sematary he’s regained … most of his faculties. However, his passing was a technicality that created a power vacuum in Cancelvania, the land of canceled entities where the Dudes took up residence a few years back. Boo stepped in as Fear Leader and has ruled with an iron fist in linen wrapping ever since.
It’s election time in the U.S., and coincidentally, in Cancelvania as well. Boo is running on a #MourningInCancelvania platform focused on ridding the place of new-school canceled folk and, um, making Cancelvania truly monstrous again. Can Hackenslash regain the seat of power with his #GreaterOfTwoEvils campaign and its focus on the children, whose water supply is contaminated with weed, leaving them with an insatiable case of the munchies?
All this has led to a prime “chopportunity” for superproducer Bloody Buddy Pearlman. He’s cobbled together some tracks from abandoned sessions and released them as Toad/Retoad. The title, you’ll note, nods to the enfranchisement of Cancelvania’s toads under the Boo regime. The album is a treat bag of styles, from the dub ballad “Skelletons Are My Neighbors” [sic] to the well-preserved beats of “Do the Dirt Nap Dougie” (did you miss Terry the Horror Clown?) to the spooOOOky tale of social media bots “The Legend of Creepy Follow.” Bummer news, by the way, for fans who were hoping to one day hear the Dudes’ majestic prog opus Spookydelica 2045: Hackenslash revealed that he made a meal of the master tapes.
Give the album a spin via Bandcamp, watch for some campaign activity during The Belcourt’s (sold out) 13th annual horror-movie marathon 12 Hours of Terror on Saturday, and watch the Dudes’ InstaGRIM for election updates.
