Comedian, musician, host of Chris Crofton's Advice King Podcast and former Nashvillian Chris Crofton asked the Scene for an advice column, so we gave him one. Crowning himself the “Advice King,” Crofton will share his hard-won wisdom with whosoever seeks it. Follow Crofton on Facebook and Twitter, and to submit a question for the Advice King, email bestofbread[at]gmail[dot]com or editor[at]nashvillescene[dot]com.
Dear Advice King,
What did Nashville’s Vice Mayor Jim Shulman mean when he accused his constituents of “bad politics”? How are Vice Mayor Shulman’s Nashville constituents supposed to express themselves if doing so at a public hearing is “bad politics”? Please advise me on how to successfully interact with Vice Mayor Shulman.
—Daniel in Nashville
First of all, what Daniel is referring to happened last week, at a public hearing on the proposed 2021 budget for Metro Nashville. Nashville’s Vice Mayor Jim Shulman got very mad at the public for expressing their opinion, which is pretty funny since that was the whole reason for the hearing. Also, he works FOR the public, ostensibly. Sooooooo, anyway ...
Dear God, you just made me read a budget. I designed my life so I would never have to read a budget. What a depressing experience. They put a cheerful picture of some kind of sculpture on the first page, by the way. Just proves that old adage “you can’t judge a dystopia’s budget by its cover sheet.”
The budget I’m talking about is the proposed Metro Nashville budget for the fiscal year 2021. I also designed my life so I would never have to hear about “fiscal years.” Thanks a lot for ruining my entire life’s plan with this question, Daniel.
You might be thinking, “What does a life designed specifically so you never have to read a budget look like?” Well, you just don’t own much stuff or have a family. And you don’t have a fire pit, a roof deck or a lake house. And you don’t play golf. It’s fine, too. I have a lot of fun, and I’ve never had to read a budget — UNTIL NOW.
The first thing I noticed was that police and jails are supposed to get $290,642,200. The second thing I noticed was social services are penciled in for a hot $7,408,000.*
Since you are reading this sophisticated column in this erudite publication, I am going to assume you have been paying attention to what’s been going on in the United States (and the world) in the last couple weeks. If you have, I’m sure you’ve heard people talking about “defunding the police.” “Defund the police” does not necessarily mean, “get rid of the police.” It means taking funds away from the police and putting them toward community services.
Are you aware that it is nearly IMPOSSIBLE to get timely help for a mental health emergency in this country? People who are having mental breakdowns are routinely told to “go to the emergency room.” The emergency room costs money. About 28 million people in America don’t have health insurance, so they tend not to go to the emergency room**. They stay home and self-medicate with alcohol and pills until they FLIP THE FUCK OUT. Then the police are called. The police are not mental health professionals — far from it, in fact. Violence often ensues. So, maybe if you broke off a few million from the “police and jails” part of the budget, and put it toward public mental health services.
I know, it’s a CRAZY IDEA!
Since police are, ahem, “in the news” right now, people happen to be looking at budgets all of a sudden, many for the first time — like me — and they DO NOT like what they see. The “bad politics” Jim Shulman is talking about could also be described as “new politics,” or “politics that challenge the status quo.” In case you haven’t noticed, Mr. Shulman, the status quo is NOT WORKING, so people would like to CHALLENGE IT. And that’s what public hearings are for, Mr. Shulman.
Your constituents aren’t engaging in “bad politics,” Mr. Shulman — they are engaging in good politics that you just don’t want to hear about or deal with. And your response to these new, improved politics is NOT new, or improved in any way. You are attempting to use the “Silent Majority” defense. That old, discredited, Nixonian mind trick: “Most people are not this radical, but they just can’t get through on the phone because all these rabble rousers are taking up too much time. There are a ton of people who think our budget is great, I just wish they were here instead of these other … fake people?”
Is that what they are Mr. Shulman, fake people? That’s how you treated them. Those polite, composed citizens who you were caught on camera trying to intimidate. The ones patiently waiting to express their opinion at a PUBLIC HEARING ON THE BUDGET. Were those people “paid by George Soros”? Is the whole nation — and all the people of all the other nations out in the streets — paid by George Soros? Is everyone who disagrees with a budget that gives 40 times more money to police and jails than to social services crazy? No, they aren’t. These are your real constituents, Mr. Shulman, and they are hurting. You cannot dismiss them as a conspiracy. The “silent majority” is the conspiracy. You — and many others like you in positions of power who are not used to being challenged — are the ones who are acting crazy.
The people who attended that hearing did everything right, Daniel. There is no reason to change your mind or your approach. It is time for those in power to change theirs.
*Editor's note: There are a lot of other things that you might categorize as social services throughout the budget. But as the Nashville People's Budget Coalition points out, this budget proposes an increase of $6 million for the criminal legal system with cuts in almost all the other categories that they classify as "public goods." That includes a cut of more than $7.1 million from Metro schools.
**American emergency rooms aren’t equipped to handle mental health emergencies, either. They basically tell you to go home and make an appointment with a mental health professional. Best-case scenario, they give you sleeping pills. Worst: They put you on a 72-hour hold, and THEN they tell you to go home and make an appointment with a mental health professional. I know this from experience — I suffered from severe panic attacks in my 20s.
