Booze Hound: The Roundup at Nicky’s Coal Fired

“Who gon’ check me, boo?”

“They’re not knives — they’re just hands!”

“Joooo-vaaaaaaaaa-ni!”

Here’s the thing about the new drink menu at Nicky’s Coal Fired: You either get all the above references, or you think I’m finally having the psychotic break everyone’s been waiting for. If you’re among the latter — sorry, not today, Satan! If you’re among the former, you’ll be delighted to learn that all the fall cocktails at Nicky’s have been named for the single most important cultural phenomenon of our time: Bravo’s The Real Housewives.

I laughed so hard I cried, dear reader, when I put the pieces together. Sonja’s Townhouse, Bye Wig, The Grande Dame, Alene Too — the hits Just. Keep. Coming. The good news is that these drinks — the names of which are Housewives references — are delicious whether you’re a garbage human who lives for Bravo (me) or someone whose head nearly explodes every time you hear someone screech, “I’m sorry if I made you feel that way!” (my husband). 

My favorite is The Roundup, an homage to the One True Queen of Batshit Mountain: Dallas’ LeeAnne Locken. The quote that inspired this drink is so raunchy I’m not sure even the Scene would print it, so I’ll just tell you what’s in it: Wild Turkey, lemon, peach and Braulio amaro, an herbal Italian liqueur. The taste is Fall Classic-meets-Embarcadero with plenty of autumnal notes, and it is devilishly drinkable. It’s also strong, sweetly sour and oddly addictive. And if you underestimate it, it will kill you — just like our dear LeeAnne.

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