The Connection
Staring down the deadline of this year’s Pride Issue got me thinking about some of the things that people in the community talk about — things that don’t necessarily make their way to straight folks. So here, Scene readers, are a few questions I felt like asking friends and longtime Nashvillians in the LGBTQ community. We aren’t a monolith — opinions will vary.
Contributors include John Bridges, former editor of the Nashville Scene; Cody; Josh Harper (bon vivant/research scientist); Sheronica Hayes (activist/artist); Rose Marie Pink (Launchpad Nashville); Russell Yarborough (DJ and Nashville icon); and yours truly (freelance media prophet).
What, and when, is the space you associate most with LGBTQIA+ Nashville?
I worked at Tribe and Play years ago, and they’re still the first thing that comes to mind. I love the Nashville Gaymer group, and of course the Lipstick Lounge is one of my favorite places on earth! I’m also excited about the new monthly Glitz events at Old Glory, because it’s pulled me out of my comfort zone and introduced me to new people and places. I’d check out the kickball or rugby [leagues] too, but I’m a total night owl and they do things before noon, which is before I ever even exist. Event-wise, I’m honestly never that excited for the Pride festival — June is a stupid month to schedule outdoor daytime activities in the South. JH
The World’s End. The Connection in the late ’90s. The CD and 12-inch singles department at Tower Records. Outloud. JS
All the living rooms and progressive churches and places that planning for activism takes place in the South. RMP
Whenever I reflect on any of the many New Year’s Eve celebrations hosted at the Connection, I recall being more astonished with each passing year’s segue into the next by the massive amount of gay and gay-friendly people packed shoulder to shoulder in euphoric jubilation. Undulating waves in a strobe-light sea of confetti-covered faces and raised cocktails. Year after year, that increasing number of people never failed to amaze and make me proud. RY
My fondest memories were born almost a decade ago in the middle of nowhere, at Chameleon’s Lounge. Just beyond the city’s reach. So uninvaded and perfectly inviting to those of us seeking a familiar comfort that the larger, more popular bars in town no longer provided. SH
Do you feel safer in Nashville today than in the past?
I’ve honestly never felt unsafe in Nashville. I generally think of Nashville as a friendly city, in that “everybody’s Republican but they’re going to be polite and friendly because they’re Southern” kind of way. JH
It’s not a Nashville thing, as I’ve always felt mostly safe here. But in this country at this point in time, I don’t think anyone who isn’t a straight white Christian male feels safer than they did even five years ago. JS
I dont feel any more or less safe than I ever have, but I’m always cautious about public displays of affection outside of explicitly queer spaces. C
Not necessarily. To exist as a cis African American femme is usually to be invisible to the public. I find that unless my behavior does not “disrupt” my environment, my environment does not acknowledge my behavior at all. Although I have been fortunate enough to not be the target of a (hate) crime in this city, I will not dismiss the likelihood of ever being so. Being black, being a woman, being queer — a very unsafe recipe. SH
No. RY
Yes. I’ve been here for a long time. I’ve had a couple of scary encounters, and a tough time with the Metro police at least once. But I never really felt unsafe, because I just had to live the life that lay before me. That’s how you survive. JB
When non-Tennessean friends ask you why you stay, how do you respond?
If we all left, why would it ever improve? RMP
I feel no particular attachment to Nashville. This city feels like a friend who got plastic surgery over the summer, and also a strange case of amnesia? I know it, but I no longer recognize it, and it doesn’t know me at all. It’s a bizarre way to live. It’s just that here is where I am, and staying is easier than not staying. SH
This is where I’m from, and I’m very obstinate when it comes to yielding to homophobic assholes. JS
Nashville is a sweet, harmonious place where people are genuinely considerate and it’s relatively easy to live. I’ve lived here for the greater part of my life, but for the past 15 years my “home” is with the man I love, and no matter where that may be, that’s where I plan to stay. RY
I love Nashville. My friends are here, as is my past. Why would I want to move? JB
This is home. C
What most says closeted-Nashville to you?
Faceless profiles on the apps. C
Christian music stars and Clarksville Army boys who are always at Tribe and Play. JH
Cane Ridge Park. RY
Specific gyms. RMP
Do you think Nashville is a better place for the LGBTQIA+ community?
It doesn’t feel dangerous being queer in the way it felt a little scary when I was coming out in eighth grade, but the risk of losing our most creative amazing people because they aren’t independently wealthy is a depressingly real thing. RMP
While I don’t feel like New Nashville threatens the LGBTQIA community, I don’t particularly feel as if the city has done more to serve its LGBTQIA community either. And there is an absolute harm that comes in stagnancy while everything around you is evolving. This is a town of individuals who are so involved in their own agendas, that they are blind or indifferent to a larger cause, and there is no greater threat to impactful growth than indifference. SH
Our city has changed, for the better insofar as lesbians and gay men are concerned. I don’t think it’s better for trans people, but they’re coming out more and more, and that will make the difference. They’re being brave, but they’re not getting much help. But I fear that is the situation in the world, right now. I can’t speak for the rest of the alphabet. Nashville has been an accepting place, at least for me. But I’m not talking about Tennessee. I’m just talking about Nashville. JB
Somewhat, but it also feels like we are slowly losing our spaces. They’re either closing down or attracting an increasingly not-queer crowd. C
I’ve seen so many old standards vanish, and so many places come and go, and it’s kinda sad. And if I find it sort of limited — and I’m a cis white gay guy — I can’t even imagine how the LBTQIA parts feel. It kinda feels like there’s a growing interest in expanding outside of specifically queer places and incorporating into the greater community, which is interesting. JH
We get synth-pop shows now, which is good. But we have no infrastructure for the number of folks living here, and too many awesome people are getting priced out of the city. JS
What’s the song you most associate with personal liberation?
Oh God, I’m such a Nashville gay — my brain just immediately screamed, “ ‘Fancy’ by Reba! ‘Independence Day’ by Martina!” followed immediately by “ ‘Stronger’ by Kelly Clarkson! ‘Let It Go’ by Elsa! ‘Defying Gravity’ by Elphaba!” JH
Even though it has that break that can kill a dance floor that isn’t uniformly feeling it, I have to go with the Jimmy Gomez Mix of “Life, Love and Happiness” by Brian Kennedy. JS
Old school: “Hand Grenade” by Team Dresch. More current: “Juice” by Lizzo. RMP
For the moment, I’ll say “I’ll Follow My Secret Heart,” by Noël Coward. Because he was gay, and he wrote the lyrics and the music. The world knew what he was talking about. It wasn’t much of a secret to anybody who really mattered to him. I love this song. I can actually sing along. JB
Hands down — “Nann Nigga” by Trick Daddy featuring Trina. Specifically Trina’s verse. It embodies the sexual awareness and freedom that I aspire to daily. SH
“Tomorrow” by The Communards. RY
