It's hard out here for a swingers club valet, as the old song goes.
According to a lawsuit filed in U.S. District Court, Joshua Gulden worked for more than nine months at Menages at 701 Drexel Street. The name is a little on the nose, but just in case we needed clarification, the federal complaint informs us Menages is, in fact, a "private swingers club."
During his nine months there, Gulden claims he was never paid any wages.
Gulden's primary job was parking cars, of course, but he had other duties: "maintained the grounds, took out trash, ran errands for patrons and other duties assigned by [Menages]."
All of those, obviously, could be hilarious euphemisms, but let's stay out of the gutter here, folks. This is a lawsuit related to a man's livelihood that was filed in the U.S. District Court and there's a level of decorum that must be maintained.
The complaint continues that Gulden worked Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights, approximately 26 hours per week. You'll notice 26 does not go evenly into three, which means some of those evenings were longer than others. Not that length matters, of course. It's what you do with your time (again in Gulden's case, he "parked cars, maintained the grounds, took out trash, ran errands for patrons and other duties," which are actual, legitimate things and not wink-wink words for something else; please quit snickering). Gulden says on three occasions, he was required to arrive 90 minutes early, as well.
And then there's this paragraph, which — according to our crack legal research team here at Southcomm World HQ — includes a phrase which has never once appeared in a filing in the U.S. District Court for the Middle District of Tennessee, a court which was created in 1839*:
In addition to his regular workweek schedule, Plaintiff worked "Gangbang Wednesday," an event hosted by Defendant every first Wednesday of the month. Plaintiff worked approximately 9.5 hours during these events.
They didn't even pay him for work during Gangbang Wednesday. No justice, no peace.
According to the filing, Gulden was allowed to split tips with another valet, but was never paid wages and in addition, was required to remit $50 per week to Menages, allegedly to cover liability insurance.
Gulden is claiming violation of the Fair Labor Standards Act and seeks payment of his unpaid wages (not a greedy man, he just wants $7.25 per hour), plus an equal amount in liquidated damages, in addition to attorney's fees and so on.
* — The first judge, by the way, was a guy named Morgan Welles Brown, who, according to that Who Do You Think You Are? TV program may well have been an ancestor of Lionel Richie; that's a story for another time, perhaps.
