If a 20-sided die could sing, it would sound like Ronnie James Dio. While either heaven, hell or both — if that’s possible — have a new voice of rock, the metal world here on this mortal coil is one big Bummerino Metropolis as news breaks that sire of the devil-horn hand gesture, sonic shaman of the Gothic and all-around holy diver Ronnie James Dio has killed the dragon of mere mortality and ridden a tiger over that big ole rainbow in the May sky so dark yesterday. In other words: Dio has died at 67.
Conventional wisdom dictates that no act is more metal than that of going the way of all flesh. Physical immortality is just not metal. As you will see in the handful of videos I’ve decided to post in memoriam to metal’s most consummate — and well-screwed-on — head, you’ll see that perhaps no dude embodied Medieval metal culture as completely as Dio. Therefore, Dio is now unequivocally more metal than Ozzy. If Ozzy was even as close to as metal as Dio was, he would’ve died from railing a line of ants, like, 99 lives ago. He also wouldn’t have had that cred-killing celebreality show ... or those children of his.
It is now believed, and fantasized by many, that Dio is already fronting a revamped, supernatural lineup of Heaven and Hell in the great beyond that features Cliff Burton on bass, Eric Carr on drums and Dimebag Darrell on guitar. It is also believed they rock.
R.I.P., Dio.
