'Johnny Cash Is Dead and His House Burned Down,' the Song

Open up your accordion folder and prepare to file this one directly under WTmothereffinF. John Carter Cash (June and Johnny's son) is apparently behind some sort of viral marketing scheme promoting a song called, I shit you not, "Johnny Cash Is Dead and His House Burned Down." Along with Snoop Dogg's befuddling "I Walk the Line" remix and Adam Lambert's documented American Idol necrophiliac take on "Ring of Fire," there is apparently some sort of conspiracy to defile Johnny Cash's legendary status. I take that back; nothing's going to defile Johnny's standing. Some fools are just dangerously close to looking foolish. That's all. This is what John Carter Cash has to say about the song, via Idolator:

When I first heard the song "Johnny Cash is Dead and his House Burned Down" I smiled. There are few who could sing these words and get away with it. I don't know of anyone else who could sing this and not only get away with it in my heart by only more closely endear themselves to me. It is not a song about a man dying and a house burning, it is about a time passing, a certain quality of artist and entertainer just not being here. It reminds me that though there are many inspired and dedicated artists alive today, there will never be another Johnny Cash, another Roy Orbison, or a Waylon Jennings....Though the words of the song may shock, they fulfill their purpose: They get your attention and inspire further investigation.

If you say so, dude. Apparently

and a Twitter page and all sorts of stuff dedicated to this yet-to-be-heard song. In a

(it contains only text), there's an allusion to a "life long friendship" Cash fostered with someone back in 1972. This mysterious friend was sweeping floors as a janitor when he met Cash and buddied up with him. As many folks know, that sounds an awful lot like the story of how Cash and Kris Kristofferson met. So...this song is either performed by Kristofferson or Will Hunting? The author of that Idolator post mentions that it might be Larry Gatlin. I don't know who it is, but it can't possibly be any worse than the Snoop Dogg remix. Right? Please??