Poor planning and attending Bonnaroo don’t go together well. I learned that lesson the hard way in 2007, when as a rookie I showed up to the farm with nothing but booze, and I tried to sleep in my car. Didn’t happen. Now, with less than 24 hours to go before gates open at Manchester’s Great Stage Park, distressed hippies, hipsters and other ticket-less fucks are discovering the harsh realities and tough consequences of complacency, as, according to its official site, Bonnaroo 2013 is sold … the fuck …out!
The options are limited for shit-out-of-luck aspiring attendees. They can either gate crash (which, unless you want to add even more irony to that “Don’t tase me, bro!” shirt of yours, I would strongly, strongly, strongly discourage); they can drop mad loot for tickets on StubHub; they deal with huckster scalpers outside the festival; they can troll for tickets on Craigslist … or … they can stay home, bask in the temperate wonders of central air conditioning and stream Bonnaroo live via the festival's official Ustream webcast throughout the weekend.
