College Survival Guide

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College Survival Guide 2007
OK, so you’ve left behind trig, proms and riding around in the back of a pickup truck for weekend amusement.


Damian’s Lair: Collegiate Edition
Dear Damian: I think my English Lit professor is coming on to me.


Pillow Talk
There’s a lot more to do these days in dorm room decor than bringing in a twin-sized quilt and a new purchase from allposters.com.


Someone Is Trying to Break Your Heart
by Tracy Moore
Hey, college kid. Mind if I pull up a stool? Sometimes I sit around drinking, bitterly reminiscing about the things “they” never told me in college.


Stay in School
If I could share just one nugget of wisdom with an audience of bright-eyed college hopefuls and thriving coeds, I would choose this: don’t graduate.


Turn On. Tune In. Drop Out.
by Brent Rolen
So graduating high school at the top of your class with a cap full of extracurricular feathers got you into a prestigious private college with a four-year tuition more than some people’s mortgages.


You Got Served
by Elizabeth Ulrich
There’s a reason why Boy George and Naomi Campbell had to take to scrubbing floors at a sanitation plant. They did something wrong, something that merited punishment. And community service was their penance.

From the Archives

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Playing the Art
by Claire Suddath
Well, this is it. You’re in college. You can design your own schedule, choose your own classes, and if you’re an English major you can breathe a sigh or relief and know that calculus homework is a thing of the past.

How I Got a Job at the Scene
by Dave Rudolph
I came across former Scene editor Bruce Dobie’s name one afternoon while scouring my alma mater’s alumni website for school contacts in Nashville.

College Prep
by Lee Stabert
Having graduated from college in 2005, I feel qualified to pass on to you incoming freshmen some advice as you matriculate into higher education. Tips like these below could have saved me from puking on some boy’s computer and crying myself to sleep to

Fort Awesome
The strange funk that hangs over Murfreesboro year-round has been the inspiration for more than a few contemporary legends.

Is That Bedcore?
by Tracy Moore
I’m in a fake band. We write real songs, play them and record them, but we don’t play live shows, and we don’t make records. The reason for this is simple: we suck.