Presidential Politics

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Romney Taps Haslam To Chair Tennessee Campaign

Posted By on Tue, Feb 14, 2012 at 1:17 PM

Execute: smile.exe (v 2.4)
  • Execute: smile.exe (v 2.4)

Gov. Bill Haslam has been named Tennessee state campaign chairman for the walking OCD diagnosis known as Mitt Romney following an official endorsement by the Haslam last month. The news shouldn't be all that shocking since Haslam's father and brother also work for Romney's campaign, which can be considered either a partnership predicated on moderate Republican ideals, a return on investment regarding Romney's support of the governor during the 2010 gubernatorial election, birds of platinum-gilded feathers flocking together, or some combination of the three.

If a recent American Research Group poll is any indication, however, Romney will need the support of the Pilot-Flying J Dynasty: In a telephone interview conducted Feb. 8-9, 600 likely Tennessee GOP primary voters favored Rick Santorum by a full 7 points over the former Massachusetts governor, 34-27, because we love freedom.

News that Romney's Super PAC has begun buying air time in eastern and middle Tennessee has prompted human paraquat Newt Gingrich (who netted 16 percent in the ARG poll) to announce a trip to our humble state next week, where donors with a couple grand to burn can score a photo with America's true conservative sweetheart.

From Knox News:

Gingrich has scheduled a Feb. 27 fundraising event at a Franklin, Tenn., residence. Basic tickets are $1,000 each with $2,500 needed to attend a "VIP reception with photo opportunity," according to a printed invitation.

State Rep. Tony Shipley, R-Kingsport, who is co-chairman of Gingrich's campaign in Tennessee, said there may be other events in Tennessee.

Hopefully this means that the gods will deign to bestow us with a Romney performance prior to the March 6 primary. Hell, I'd fire my best maid just to hear him rattle a few Johnny Cash tunes...

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Friday, January 20, 2012

Southern Man Don't Need Mitt Around Anyhow

Posted By on Fri, Jan 20, 2012 at 5:12 AM

I particularly love America today, when you can feel the full weight of its story come crashing down hard as if the past had never left. As when Rick Perry, departing the race, looked over his shoulder at the thin-lipped tightwad Massachusetts Yankee leading the pack, and in a moment of blood bondage, Texan to Georgian, said, "I'm with Newt."

Yeah, Gingrich is about as Southern as sea bass in béarnaise in Buckhead, but it didn't matter. And yeah, Gingrich is a little too smarty-pants and fond of waving his hands around like a decorator showing curtains. But Perry and Gingrich are old enough to have been taught never to support the Northerner. Particularly a Northerner who happens to be an asshole. "My Gawd, Newt, we got us a two-fer. It's lesson time."

In defeat, Perry understood well-staged retribution before his tactical retreat to Austin. He and Newt may be the last generation of Southerners who feel this way, but how righteous and apt it is that this takes place in the state whose residents a century and a half ago really couldn't wait for the rest of the South to secede and went at it alone on Sumter?

Continue reading »

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Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Quote of the Day: Mitt Romney Embarrasser for Hire

Posted By on Wed, Jan 18, 2012 at 1:33 PM

"Look at my picture and ask yourself 'Would he really do that for money?' YOU CAN TELL I WOULD! The possibilities are endless for the highest bidder. As long as it isn't against the law, I'll do or say whatever you want until someone comes and drags me away."

—Ron D., a Loudon, Tenn., man and self-described "biggun" whose auction listing titled "I will embarrass Mitt Romney on national TV for money" was pulled by eBay.

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Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Quote of the Day: Darrell Hillis for President Starts Today!

Posted By on Tue, Dec 20, 2011 at 4:30 PM

"Because I have no money or name recognition I plan on running my campaign on the internet."
Brentwood accountant Darrell Hillis, 55, announcing that he is throwing his hat in the ring as an independent candidate in the 2012 presidential election. His full press release appears below.

Continue reading »

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Monday, December 5, 2011

Tennessee Republican Primary Will Be March 6, Include Nine Candidates

Posted By on Mon, Dec 5, 2011 at 3:27 PM

The Tennessee Republican party sent around an email just now, announcing that the state's "Presidential Preference Primary" will be held on March 6 (aka Super Tuesday) and will include the following candidates on the ballot: Michele Bachmann, Newt Gingrich, Jon Huntsman, Gary Johnson, Ron Paul, Rick Perry, Charles “Buddy” Roemer, Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum.

Perhaps ironically, the roster of nine candidates does not include the 9-9-9 candidate himself, who was leading in at least one Tennessee poll as recently as a month ago. Then again, maybe Cain will un-suspend his campaign and have a new Pokemon quote to share with us by then.

Full release below:

Continue reading »

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Friday, September 23, 2011

Boos for Gay Soldier at Republican Debate

Posted By on Fri, Sep 23, 2011 at 10:10 AM

H/T to Chicago Steve, who forwarded this to us with the message: "Things GOP crowds have now cheered: people without insurance, executing prisoners who may be innocent. Things GOP crowds have now booed: gay soldiers in Afghanistan Iraq."

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Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Rick Perry and the Drought: What If God Hates You?

Posted By on Tue, Aug 16, 2011 at 6:36 AM

Secession? Really?
  • Secession? Really?
Maybe the title of this post is a little snarky, but I've been thinking about this since Ron Ramsey decided that a guy who doesn't like the Union well enough to necessarily keep it in one piece is the person in the country most fit to lead it. Texas Gov. Rick Perry makes a big deal out of being a religious dude. You remember his great Day of Prayer for rain back in April?

Well, it's the middle of August now and there's no rain in Texas. Almost 80 percent of Texas is at the worst levels of drought.

So, did Texans just not pray hard enough? Is God sending some kind of message to Rick Perry? What if that message is that Rick Perry shouldn't run for president? Or that global warming is real? Or maybe it's that God rightly responds poorly to "If you really love me, you'll do [x]" type manipulations? Or that God won't come through for desperate people who really need help? Or that God is not Rick Perry's genie?

I don't know. But I'm not sure how anyone does. Texas prayed for rain. It didn't come. Who knows if there's some divine message?

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Thursday, July 28, 2011

Quote of the Day: Herman Cain Is Sorry if He Offended You or Your Muslim Friends

Posted By on Thu, Jul 28, 2011 at 11:30 AM

“While I stand by my opposition to the interference of shariah law into the American legal system, I remain humble and contrite for any statements I have made that might have caused offense to Muslim Americans and their friends.”

—Presidential hopeful and former Allahfather's Godfather's Pizza CEO Herman Cain, kinda-sorta apologizing for some of the stuff he said, while also not taking back any of that stuff he said about the Islamic Center of Murfreesboro.

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Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Biden: His Time in Nashville, June 27

Posted By on Wed, Jun 15, 2011 at 1:20 PM

At, Ken Whitehouse is reporting that Vice President Joseph Biden will be in Nashville June 27 for a fundraiser in Hillsboro Village:

Biden will appear at a fundraiser for Rep. Jim Cooper, who has often been a thorn in the side of the administration of President Barack Obama and the leadership of the Democratic Minority in the U.S. House of Representatives on matters concerning the national debt. The event will take place at the Hillsboro Village eatery Cabana.

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Thursday, February 10, 2011

Pardon Me: 'Marijuana Martyr' Bernie Ellis Appeals to President Obama

Posted By on Thu, Feb 10, 2011 at 5:38 AM

Over the years, the Scene has followed the case of Bernie Ellis, the Middle Tennessee man who became a cause celebre when he was busted for growing small amounts of cannabis on his farm in the Santa Fe community. He wasn't selling his stash; he was using it to offset a medical condition and sharing it with critically ill cancer patients, some of whom had been referred on the QT by sympathetic medical professionals.

For his trouble, he received an initial sentence of four years' probation, lost his 30-year career as a public-health epidemiologist, and was forced to give up 25 acres of his land to the government. Instead of clamming up, however, Ellis has become an outspoken activist for medical marijuana — a nationally recognized advocate who helped draft a proposal for a state-operated medical-cannabis program that just resurfaced this session in the Tennessee General Assembly.

To rid himself of his nine-year ordeal once and for all, Ellis is now appealing to the highest authority in the land — President Barack Obama — and the American public that supports the issue in growing numbers. On the blog Democrats for Progress, Ellis has announced a campaign to get a pardon from President Obama. He has the three primary character references he needs, but he's hoping submission of other letters from supporters will help his chances — just as he believes the 300-plus testimonials he received from otherwise law-abiding citizens helped by his efforts got his time cut in half at his sentencing hearing.

Anyone wanting to help his cause will find instructions here at the bottom of the page.

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