The suit — set to go before Judge Steve Dozier for a June 29 hearing — declares that the KPG and specifically 24 of its most active members are public nuisances to the city and should be legally prevented from associating with one another within a 1.43-square-mile “safety zone.” In addition, KPG gangsters would be forbidden from being in either Paragon Mills Park or nearby Providence Park at all.
But Providence Park is an unsafe shithole. If we're not going to fix the park, let's use its unsafe shithole status to our advantage. Give that park to the Kurdish Pride Gang. Not just territory-wise. I mean, deed the motherfucking park to the Kurdish Pride gang. Initially we'll see a drop off in gang activity as they fall into one of the open sewer pits and hurt themselves or trip along one of the warped walkways and injure themselves.
But then, once they're the landlords, either we take them to court to force them to improve the park to remove the safety hazards, or we bankrupt the gang through requiring them to carry massive insurance to cover the cost of injury should some kid get her head stuck in the fencing or by fining them for all the safety violations.
Worst-case scenario? Kurdish Pride members are easy to identify by their sprained ankles and lockjaw.
Best-case scenario? They actually clean up the park.
How is that not a win-win for the city?