OK, I admit it. It's a breeding ground for terrorists — people who want to undermine everything worthwhile about the American way of life.
That's right. I'm talking about Saturday Night Live, and their training camp for comedy jihadists. "Oh, he's just being an alarmist," you say. For those of you who are laughing, let me point out some frightening evidence:
Jim Belushi. Gary Kroeger. Brad Hall.
Still not convinced? Rob Schneider. Gilbert Gottfried.
And then there's the most committed of them all. She's been waging a one-woman war on humor for over a quarter-century.
Yes, we're talking about Victoria Jackson.
The anti-comedian turned conservative commentator (I know, it's redundant) is in town working on a story about the Islamic Center of Murfreesboro and its new mosque, to be posted on The Patriot Update, which features the tagline, "A Free Press for the Conservative Devolution." Oops. I mean "Evolution."
On a NewsChannel 5 report last night, Jackson had this to say:
I'm trying to use my fading SNL fame to shine a light on a topic that nobody in the media will talk about. ... I think this big Islamic center will be a breeding ground for terrorists. I mean, duh! I mean, this is the Bible Belt, and Murfreesboro is the buckle on the Bible Belt, and it's a college town, so my feeling is they came here to convert people to Islam.
They came here to convert people to Islam. Uh, Victoria, is trying to convert people to their religion a problem? Because in the 15 years I've lived in Nashville, I've had people try to convert me to Christianity somewhere in the area of 15 to 20 times. And the number of times Muslims have tried to convert me? Uh, let me think. Zero.
Jackson also said that she had interviewed Republican congressional candidate Lou Ann Zelenik, whom she refers to as "an expert on Islam." Which of course is like calling David Duke an expert on black people.
The great irony here, of course, is that when Jackson tried to be funny, she wasn't funny at all. And now that she's trying to be serious, she's hilarious.
Furthermore, if comedic talent determines political veracity, the liberals are kicking ass. I mean, in a comedy battle royale between Team A (Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert and Bill Maher) and Team B (Dennis Miller, Brad Stine and Victoria Jackson), who's your money on?