If you weren't in the process of seeking shelter from the aftershocks of yesterday's mammoth earthquake, then you probably had the chance to pick up a copy of The Tennessean — not saying you did, you know, but you had that chance. In one possible universe, maybe you picked up a copy. In another, maybe you scaled their Gannettean fortress of banner ads and read it online. If you did the latter, here's the front page you missed:
No matter what universe the folks at 1100 Broadway actually live in, chances are good that in most of them, at least one person suffers from hyper-extended calf muscles due to repeatedly kicking themselves in the face over deciding to run the falsely prophetic headline "GET READY TO START SCHOOL IN JULY." Contrary to its suggestion, the Metro School Board last night voted to adopt a balanced calendar that begins Aug. 1 — not exactly July, but much closer than, say, January, so they've got that going for them.
Granted, this isn't the worst possible screw-up in the history of worst possible screw-ups, but you'd think that the practitioners of a dying medium would do their best to not give people yet another reason to put down the paper and turn on the television.
Dileo was the subject of a November 2007 Scene cover piece outlining his storied career. And we mean storied. He worked his way up from the bottom of the music industry to become one of the most powerful men in the biz. During his tenure at Epic Records, he was instrumental in signing or developing the careers of Culture Club, Cyndi Lauper, REO Speedwagon, Quiet Riot, The Clash and of course Jackson. Dileo lived in Nashville briefly in the ’70s and then moved here in January 2007 to start a management business, though he spent much of the last three years in Los Angeles after returning as Jackson's manager, and then handling issues with the late pop singer's estate.
His larger-than-life persona landed him a couple of movie roles, most famously as Tuddy Cicero in Martin Scorsese's Goodfellas. Not only did he play the brother to Mafia boss Paulie Cicero, but he was responsible for one of the most legendary mob hits in cinema history, putting a bullet in the back of Joe Pesci's head in the film's climactic scene.
An excerpt from the Scene story, about Dileo's ever-present cigar:
There’s speculation that when he emerged from the womb, 60 years ago last month, Frank Dileo already had a cigar in his mouth. Look at the pictures on his office walls and in his photo albums, and more often than not he’s either holding or chomping on a fat, unlit stogie.
This spring I moved to Nashville from New York to be a guest curator at Cheekwood, and within a few weeks I was introduced to the collections of established local art patrons. Their art possessions come with serious provenance — they have traveled through prestigious museums and major auction houses. Some own single paintings that cost more than an average person's home. If you ask these people about their collections, their lips tighten into a straight line and you can almost see an inner alarm system going off. It's sort of like asking about a stock portfolio, which, essentially, is what art collections of that caliber are.
I, on the other hand, can be transparent about my modest collection, most of which has been donated to me by artists themselves. But I'm also the kind of budding collector that looks at Herb and Dorothy Vogel — the famous librarian and postal-worker couple who cultivated an enviable collection of contemporary art with their modest incomes — for guidance. I don't have disposable income, I work in the arts and therefore make scratch, but in the interest of putting money where my mouth is, I invest in artists.
I don't just buy their work because I think it looks good, although that certainly counts. First I consider the way it fits into my already existing family of art works, and I think about the influence the new piece will have on my future trajectory. And, yeah, I consider it an investment, because as it stands now, the monetary value of my collection could fund a no-frills trip around the world.
Jessica Campbell makes music that’s perfect for all the Gilmore Girls fans who know Stars Hollow was a fake place but wouldn’t mind living there anyway. A North Carolina native who came to Tennessee to write songs and attend college, Campbell has perfected a winsome brand of soft pop that is the aural equivalent of a decaf and a chocolate-chip muffin — her new full-length Great Escape features double-tracked vocals, precise acoustic-guitar arrangements and plenty of sophisticated chord changes.
Much like fellow Music City pop singers Katie Herzig and Matthew Perryman Jones, Campbell doesn’t do anything like rock ’n’ roll, but that’s only because rocking would get in the way of her delicate melodies and cheerful worldview. Great Escape explores the regrets and triumphs that come with young adulthood — Campbell seems both sensible and driven, and that would make Rory Gilmore very proud.
The City Paper reports that UT Coach Pat Summitt, the college-basketball legend who has guided the Lady Vols to eight national championships, is expected to coach this season despite receiving a diagnosis of early onset dementia. From the CP:
The legendary University of Tennessee women’s basketball coach underwent tests at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minn. in May and received the stunning diagnosis.
She was expected to tell the team on Tuesday afternoon, according to the Knoxville News Sentinel. CBSSports.com first reported the news and an official announcement from the school is expected later Tuesday.
Summitt, 59, plans to coach this season, which will be her 38th at Tennessee. She is college basketball’s — men’s or women’s — all-time winningest coach with 1,071 wins...
"The load originated in Ohio. ... "
—WKRN reporting on the closure of an I-65 on-ramp southbound this morning due to spilled bull semen.
First, is there anyone in the state who believes David Fowler would refrain from busybodying about whether you're looking at porn if the state didn't pay him?
Second, how embarrassing is it for our state that no one asked, "We're going to give David Fowler $10,000 to encourage us to get rid of adult bookstores? Why don't we just wait for the ubiquity of porn on the Internet to drive them out of business and save the money?"
Third, anti-porn workshops?! Is there some contingent of community leaders who need training about how to recognize porn and adult bookshops? Am I wrong to be suspicious that we paid a bunch of money for Fowler to sit around and titillate his friends with descriptions of naked people?
Fourth, this happened in 2008? What do we have to show for it? Did Fowler manage to accomplish anything other that reinforcing his role as state busybody? Is porn consumption down in Tennessee? Are community leaders now better able to tell that an adult bookstore is an adult bookstore?
Did we get anything for our $10,000? I mean, I got a good laugh, but, honestly, it wasn't $10,000 worth of a laugh. I think we got ripped off.
A century and a half later, the Civil War still wields power of mythical proportions. We have our share of battlefields and costumed reenactments in these parts, so it’s hardly surprising that a local abundance of history — not to mention songwriting — might yield an album like The 1861 Project.
It’s a set of 17 songs — co-written by a small army of writers, including Thomm Jutz (who produced the entire batch), Charley Stefl, Irene Kelley and Scene-contributor Jon Weisberger — that tell stories of the war’s impact from more intimate vantage points. The singers change from track to track — John Anderson here, Marty Stuart, Chris Jones or Dana Cooper there. But the backing band — often featuring Dan Tyminski’s fiddler Justin Moses and Ricky Skaggs’ bassist Mark Fain — gives the whole thing a refined folk and bluegrass treatment. And a bunch of those folks, plus Paul Schatzkin serving as narrator, will be part of this live show.
So, it would seem that the gentlemen involved are having a little trouble telling WWJD from WWE, but here's the strangest part. Armstrong is a Catholic priest, employed by the Diocese of Knoxville, and yet, when the diocese was contacted by the media, its comment was this:
Fr. Armstrong is not a Roman Catholic priest, but a priest of the Ukrainian Catholic Church. He is affiliated with the Eparchy of Parma, Ohio. He is employed by the Diocese of Knoxville to perform some duties. His activities on Thursday, however, were not as an employee of the Diocese, but as a Ukrainian Catholic priest.
Lord Almighty, when was the last time you've heard something so hilariously insincere? The Ukrainian Catholic Church is in full communion with the rest of the Catholic church, and it is under the leadership of the pope, same as the Roman Catholic Church. Reverend Armstrong works for the Knoxville diocese. So, he's close enough to count when it comes to being bossed around by the pope or when they need him for something, but the second he might be involved with something a tad unseemly — like a woman being assaulted with his cross — now he's not really their kind of Catholic?
Although Nashville is approximately 1,200 miles from the Mexican border, you'd be forgiven for thinking it was within stray-bullet-striking distance of Juarez, given the bevy of local immigration-related goings-on.
Firstly, lawyers from the Southern Poverty Law Center and the National Immigration Project of the National Lawyers Guild are backing local immigration attorney Elliott Ozment in filing a motion to "end the 287(g) immigration agreement between Nashville and federal authorities," according to a press release issued today.
Per the language of the 287(g) agreement, agents from Immigration and Customs Enforcement are supposed to work with the city's "primary law enforcement agency," which is defined under Nashville's Metro charter as the Metropolitan Nashville Police Department — except for the fact that MNPD isn't the fed's designated 287(g) point man: The Davidson County Sheriff's Office is. D'oh!
The Scene has already chronicled how well the results of that supra-legal civil rights-trampling agreement are working out. (Hint: Not so much.)
According to NIPNLG attorney Trina Realmuto:
"Nashville’s 287(g) agreement conflicts with decades-old precedent from the Tennessee Supreme Court, in which the court rejected a similar attempt by the Davidson County Sheriff’s Office to usurp the enforcement functions belonging to the Nashville Police Department. Through this lawsuit, we are asking the district court to enforce both state and federal law by striking down the 287(g) agreement."
Secondly, Mayor Karl Dean is facing criticism from a prominent supporter over comments he made regarding the damages trial for Juana Villegas, the Mexican immigrant who went into labor while shackled under DCSO's authority following a minor traffic offense in July 2008.
Glad you took the time to chime in mort. Can't you find a sufficiently hyper-consevative…
Update - My head is also jammed into my ass.
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