Real quote from the WSMV story: "It bothers me because all of the parents come up here and take up every one of our parking spots waiting on their kids to get off the bus," said John Searle, the manager of Jenna's Toybox.
But wait, the adult video store is called Jenna's Toy Box! For realz! Get it? An adult store named Jenna's Toy Box? Wonder what delightful treasures await inside Jenna's Toy Box. I'd link to it, but we both know you can find it on your own.
Boner zoning, you might call it. The kids live within a half-mile of the school and are supposedly not even technically eligible for bus service, but it was implemented to help them avoid a high-risk walk to school. Only the treatment is perhaps worse than the disease. Another real quote, this one from a parent: "She hasn't asked me yet. It's just a purple building right now, so I'm glad she hasn't asked because I don't know what I would say to her if she asked."