Gloria Thompson, 57, is having a hell of a week. She and husband Herman are getting divorced. Sometimes people do irrational things during this intensely painful process. Sometimes people do just plain crazy things. Like run over a ceiling lamp with a car at Wal-Mart, resulting in a warrant for your arrest. Or get pulled over a few days later with 21 grams of grass in separate baggies.
Either way, that makes for a pretty crappy week. So on Tuesday at the Wal-Mart on Hamilton Church Road, Gloria met Herman in the parking lot for one of those uncomfortable possession exchanges. According to a police affidavit, the exchange didn't go well. Herman was supposed to bring a carpet and a ceiling lamp. They were stowed in Herman's truck bed. For whatever reason, this pissed off Gloria. So much so that she stormed out of her car, pocketed a pistol and drew a pocket knife and began shredding the carpet, damaging Herman's tailgate in the process, police documents say. Apparently, the marriage hadn't been a bed of roses. She'd had her weapon taken by police before.
Then she pulled the ceiling lamp from the truck bed, laid it out on the asphalt, crushed it with her car and sped off before police arrived to survey the remains of a perfectly good ceiling lamp. Herman got a restraining order.
Two days later, Gloria got pulled over near Fesslers Lane and Murfreesboro Pike. Police say they saw weed stems on the passenger seat. They asked her if she had anything illegal in the car. She produced baggies of pot -- 21 grams in all. And it got worse. Officers tossed her car and found two handguns. So the beset Gloria was looking at vandalism, a felony drug offense and unlawful possession of a weapon...oh, and the dissolution of her marriage, of course. But if she thought her rap sheet was finished stretching, she was wrong.
Knowing it'd probably be found as she was eventually processed, Gloria produced what the affidavit calls a "marijuana cigarette roller." "I might as well give you this," she told police.