Friday, April 3, 2009
Whopper of the Month / Woods Competition Fierce for 'Whopper of the Month' Award
Posted by Jeff Woods on Fri, Apr 3, 2009 at 5:15 AM
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Well, Pith's Committee of Insiders thought about putting this Susan Lynn quote on the list. Regarding her fabulous idea to force poor people to take drug tests, she said:
"Taxpayers are concerned. They're concerned that their tax dollars might be funding the monster of drug addiction, and they don't want that."
But the awful truth is, a lot of taxpayers are mean as damn snakes, and so that statement really isn't bullshit, which disqualifies it from the competition.
But the floor is open for nominations.
You have a woman on the list - Tennessee Democrat Party Chairgimp Chipper Forrester. If that doesn't count, we all know Jennifer Buck Wallace, Chipper's moronic executive director, made him say it.
I vote for Chipper. Everyone knows he has read every single pith-filled comment from me, Harrison, TennRod, Dr. J, TennDemocrat, and the growing ranks of the anti-Chipinista freedom fighters.
Dr. J and Woods say that Tennessee politicos are reading every word as well. To them, I add, "You like me! You REALLY like me!"
When people ask Chip "How are you?", he responds by telling them whether he has been attacked on the blogs that day - yet!
That's the God's honest truth.
Therefore, I vote for Chip Forrester.
Your turn, Harrison.
I would say Jeff Woods is the perfect candidate for the award with his yellow journalism defining headline:
"GOP wants to force poor people to take drug tests"
Lie.
There really isn't any good reason not to award the WotM on a tie:
"Family-owned businesses are part of what has made this state and this nation great." - House GOP leader Jason Mumpower defending the state tax break for rich real-estate developers, including a New York titty bar owner.
and...
"It made me appear to be ignorant and I'm not, not even close to ignorant."--Rep. Tony Shipley after a blog reported accurately that he said God might toss entire states into the ocean for being too lenient toward gay people.
***
"The essence of science is that it is always willing to abandon a given idea for a better one; the essence of theology is that it holds its truths to be eternal and immutable. To be sure, theology is always yielding a little to the progress of knowledge, and only a Holy Roller in the mountains of Tennessee would dare to preach today what the popes preached in the thirteenth century."
-- H L Mencken, Minority Report (1956), quoted from James A Haught, ed, 2000 Years of Disbelief
