Thursday, February 26, 2009
Chris Garland Kills Defenseless Bird With Bare Hand
Posted by PJ Tobia on Thu, Feb 26, 2009 at 5:13 AM
[Garland] puts on this lousy fake self-defense exhibition (sic) stating that the guys were really attacking him and had them all padded up so not to hurt them. Then they fall over like mystic voodoo bullshit. "Dude, he cut somebody that had a fucking cucumber taped to her forearm and then accused the person of moving. Without even measuring his strike he flung his nunchuka at a guy hold[ing] an apple in his mouth an KTFO [knocked him the f*%!k out.] Then he placed an apple on another guys head to kick it off. A kid about 24 in the audience yelled out "why don't you let him kick it off your fucking head" and half the crowd clapped. Then he took a poor defenseless bird in his hand. He had them dangle a board by a string in front of him. He made a fist with the bird in it and broke the fucking [board.] He kissed the bird to put it into the cage and it dropped dead on the bottom of the cage. Now he told others after the demo that the bird was simply unconscious. I'm like bullshit but either way that's cruelity to animals. Earlier that day he started talking smack to some guys in the restaurant (sic.) He was giving a seminar later that day and the guys showed up for his demo on how he was going to kick their ass. He backed down. True fucking stories guys no need to speculate."Check out our full profile of Garland from 2005. In it, we reveal that Garland misled reporters about his resume, claiming to be a special forces operative, among other fictions.
Comments (26)
Showing 1-26 of 26
I'll be honest, I don't remember when the nashville scene decided to start trying to do "real" journalism. I remember when the scene did a good job, and they would write about music, restaurants, and other shit like that.
Then they got a bunch of angry bithces on staff who wanna pick fights with people. Not only are your 2 bit writers not qualified to write "REAL" journalism, they are being classless and not even doing their full research.
Ed Clay has never done a UFC fight. You might mean MMA, which all he does is run that joke of a MMA fight at the fairgrounds and right around is that ridiculous bus of his. Point is, Ed is NOT a UFC fighter. Why not do an article of his fighter than made the news for beating up an old woman and killer her while he was working security?
I for one am calling for an apology. This article is clearly a slander article. The purpose of it isn't to inform your readers, it's simply to attempt to tarnish the image of Chris Garland. I know him very well. I was a student of his for some time, and he is an incredible athlete. I'd love to see him roll with Ed Clay. He knock his fucking head off. Ed's a poser. He's one of those "affliction" t-shirt wearing D-Bags that hangs out with fighters, but can't do shit. Ed has had a "back injury" for years now.....you really think it's his back that hurts, or it's his pussy? Hmmm.....I think I know.
In conclusion....I want to reiterate that the Scene needs to stop writing articles with no point other than public humiliation. They should be embarrassed that this article made it through the editors room. Or did they let him go due to the recession?
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Chris, I mean, "Annoyed Reader" (heh), this is a blog. It's different from a newspaper. As to why people make fun of you, maybe it's time to look in the mirror and make some tough choices about telling lies generally being a douche bag.
I've trained with both guys. They run very different gyms, Ed's is an MMA gym, if that's what you want it's great.
Chris runs a self-defense school and it's great for what it is.
Chris is a charachter and talks a lot, it's all in fun. Ed is a better trainer than fight.
Chris Garland is one of the more talented martial artists I've trained with.
I think Chris would win a fight but Ed would win in a MMA Fight with rules.
Annoyed Reader, while you are online just youtube some of Ed's fights and then check out the video of your buddy Chris trying MMA. Slightly different outcomes. I'm sure CG is a good "athlete" as you suggest and is working harder to improve the quality of his demonstrations, but he won't beat Clay in a fight. I would absolutely buy a ticket to witness that slaughter.
BTW...Since you trained w/ Chris, feel free to come on by Nashville MMA for a comparison.
After reading this junk -
I think Ed needs to come clean about him being a fighter - dude is a trainer/business man and self-promoter
Not a UFC or MMA fighter, I looked up those fights and they look pretty bush league, plus on Sherdog it said he is 3-0 and all the combined record of the 3 guys he beat is 1-4 in super low rent fights.
And his last fight was in 2003!!!
Get off his jock PJ Tobia!! Did you f' up in calling him a UFC fighter? Or did he misrepresent himself!! You need to write an article in the Scene now and call him a liar in print, that's what you do right?
http://www.whokilledestelle.org/
Ed's top fighter was indicted on manslaughter but dirty CCA money kept him out of jail..........CCA knew that if they lost the case and were proven guilty they would get hammered in a civil lawsuit by the family!!!!!
I wonder if the jury knew this guys nickname is the "warhammer" I'm sure he had nothing to do with this lady's death when he drug her out of her cell and beat her!!!!!!
I have a little issue with the truth here.
One of the most experienced in the country?
3-0 personal record and no big name fighters to speak of - I say bs flag here
International clothing line? Selling a t-shirt to a fat 14 year old in canada does not make you an international clothier?
Numerous Black belts? How many what style?
Wrestling Scholarship? Full ride? Where?
What ever happened with the Nashville Real Estate King stuff?
Anybody that took a pee in a bar a year year or two ago got to read that Ed was the "Nashville's Real Estate King"
What happened with that???
DUDE IS SNAKE OIL SALESMAN!!!!!!!!!!!
This is from Ed's website??
At his young age, Ed Clay is one of the most experience Mixed Martial Arts trainers in the country. Ed started wrestling at the age of 11 where he competed all the way to the college level. While wrestling, Ed began boxing at the age of 13, and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu at 15. After going to college on a wrestling scholarship, Ed decided he wanted to dedicate all his efforts in Mixed Martial Arts. He started training all over the country with different fighters. At the age of 19, after a brutal training session with a Thai fighter, he decided to put a great focus on his Muay Thai kickboxing. In 2002 Ed opened Nashville Mixed Martial Arts and since then NMMA has become one of the largest Mixed Martial Arts gyms in the country. Today Ed spends his time training the fighters at his gym and running his international clothing line Gameness. Both Nashville MMA and Gameness have been awarded the TN fast 50 award being two of the 50 fastest growing company’s in the state. He holds numerous black belts including being a black belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Fighters and friends from all over the world come train with him and invite him to their training camps. He has been featured in magazines and T.V. interviews with various media outlets and is currently co-host of the MMA zone on 104.5 the zone in Nashville.
To answer the posts about me being Chris Garland, I'm not.
First off, I would love to come and train at Nashville MMA, but I can't find an "affliction" T-shirt tight enough to feel like I fit in, and I don't like waxing my eyebrows or getting my tan on. Those guys see MMA as a fashion statement.
Second, I would LOVE to see Ed and Garland go toe to toe in a fight. Garland would eat him for lunch. Ed would limp back to that rolling advertisement he calls a bus.
Third. The deuche bags he has training at his gym are a bunch of has beens and never will be's. So how does this make him the best trainer in the country? Wouldn't he have to have a UFC contender to be considered that?
Fourth. Shockman is a joke. This guy kills an old woman, while he is working as a security guard and gets off the hook. REALLY? This should be something that needs to be written about. Not some fucking bird!
Fifth. Someone posted the thing about Ed's fight record. I would assume that his not so impressive record might have something to do with his no so impressive abilities as a fighter.
Listen, I can go on all day about how ridiculous this article is. It's a shame that whoever wrote this has his hand down Ed's pants, because truth be told, Nashville MMA is akin to the Cobra Kai from Karate Kid. It's a bunch of meat heads who are simply learning how to beat people up (and kill old women) and not learning the value behind a craft. It's a true shame.
And in conclusion, whoever that fag "Birdcage" is, why not write something. Sound off boy, if you are gonna choose your screen name based off of an overtly homosexual movie, you should at least have the ball hair to say something original instead of copying the first line of another deuche nozel's post. Man up.
Again, I want to reiterate that I am NOT Chris Garland. I'm simply a fan of MMA, and I hate to see the self appointed leader of the Nashville MMA be such a joke. Dude can't even fight. What he needs to do is keep working on is his "king of realty" cause he sure isn't "king of the cage"
Wow!!! Someone is jealous. Why hide behind a screen name and talk...
First the charges against Josh and Jeremy were dropped. They didn't do what they were accused of. Saying that he killed someone and got off the hook is wrong. As a fighter Josh is a beast. His full MMA record is 9-2. He has been with me since 2002.
2nd, I don't claim to be a fighter anymore. I train fighters and thats what I love to do. I would say that I personally train on average 2-3 days a week. Mostly boxing as it's the lowest impact sparring that I know of and I do have injurys. I train my fighters for 2 hours in the morning and 2 hours at night.
3rd, I've never said I'm a UFC fighter, though people confuse MMA with the UFC. It's easy to do.
4th, Now that MMA is legal in TN I will have a number of fighters out of Nashville fight in the UFC. My goal in the next 5 years is to have one of the top 5 fight teams in the world. I think we can do it... We have some good prospects coming in including Dave Herman...
http://promma.info/?p=10544
5th, The Karate Kidder did call me wanting to fight. He did most of the talking. He was offended when I said I had fighters at my gym that were better than me and I suggested he fight them. He did say word for word that he had a hard on for me. I thought it was wierd... He never showed up to my gym like he said.
6th. I'm not an affliction fan. I think it's been over done.
7th. Gameness is sold all over the world. I'm not aware of a 14 year old girl in Canada that bought a shirt but I do know of people in England, Japan, Brazil, Holland, and even Canada as you suggested. We just licensed the Gameness name to a person to sell Gameness throughout Europe.
8th I do have white belts that would beat his ass. Our school is known for competing. We compete all the time all over the world.(Cory Robison just won the European championships last month in Spain and Brazilian National in Brazil) Everytime I have heard of the Karate Kidder competing he has lost.(maybe he has won demonstration contests but I'm talking about fighting)
9th. You're right, the bus is a big huge moving advertisement. What's your point?
10. While my opponents years ago weren't very good, I think it's obvious by the below link that the Karate kidder isn't much better...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CitgE3Gz6OE
wow i wish i knew karate and kung fu like chris garlan so i can get choked out in 30 seconds and pumled in the ring
wow....i usually dont get on the internet to talk about people, but damn. Some friends told me that people were writing about me so i thought i'd check it out and boy was it worth my time. A bunch of grown men behind hiding behind anonymous screen names talking shit. How pathetic can you possibly be people. "I wonder if the jury knows if his name is the warhammer" what jury stupid fuck, the case was dropped due to the fact that 2 forensic pathologist stated that it was imposible for myself and the other three officers intitially accused to have inflicted the injuries that caused her death, so get fucked. Why dont you boys quit hiding behind screen names and come fight me if you wanna talk shit, I make my self very available. My number is 438-1715 call me, put up some money and fight me, otherwise keep my name out of your anonymous, bitch ass, hiding behind a screen name ass mouth. i dont know how an article about chris garland killing birds and having lawsuits put against him for beating up women in his gym but now i'm in it i suppose. So if you want me in, fuck it, i'm here. Shut the fuck up, quit hiding and fight me.PLEASE!!!! Come fight me, I would love to expose you fake ass cowards. I'm the real deal bitches, I dont need a fake screen name or an alias to hide behind. I'm the Warhammer damn it! I earned my name by brakin people off and smashin faces. Oh and speakin of fake names whats up with Roland Garland? I thought your name was Chris? Anyone talking shit on this website that won't put their name behind it is a coward and a bitch, so fuck anyone on here with no name.
Once again just to reiderate GET FUCKED, COME FIGHT ME!!!
Rambo Ryan here folks. Now Im sick and tired of hearing about this dumb Garland guy and his quasi real reality. What a bufoon! Listen up Chris! Youve been exposed, smacked around, man handled, humiliated not only in the cage but also now on the "internets". Bwahahahaha chump! Listen here pal, stick to beating up female students and birds. Because if you were to fight me...RAMBO Ryan, with the same kind of lackluster performances I have seen in your fights....well let me tell ya buddy, it would be the first time someone got raped in front of thousands of onlookers in a cage. Im talkin, you Mr Garland with that grisly adams beard. Face DOWN ass UP taking it like you know you want to!
Here is another one of the legendary Garlands fights. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5AqTLCFTgsc
Apparently he has to use other names as well when he fights. LOL! Oh but wait he did get kicked in the nuts right? Check out the sweet Rex Kwon Do leg sweep at 5:53....pure comic gold folks! Wait wait, what about the wild man growl when taking innumerable blows to your dome piece at 5:23?
Face it Chris, ya got pummel raped by a guy named "short bus" with a 8-7 record. Damnnnn thats rough bud.
Now if anyone has any questions about my abilities you can just search me on youtube, where you may be privy to a few spectacles of high level MMA domination.
Rambo Ryan out.
this is really starting to piss me off boys. Ever since you people put this "karate kidder" article in the scene about my life partner Christopher, his libido has'nt been the same. You sick jerks have ruined our sex life and its bullshit. You don't know how hard that man works to make money, so that I can fly to Thailand and have a sex change so I can be a real woman for him. I'm more man than any of you are and more woman than any of you jerks will ever get, so stop hating on my man. So he's killed a few birds, big deal. He is an open minded, proud gay man, and you boys just need to get over it. He is taken so get lost haters. You'll all be sorry one day, when Chris fucks my man-womb and I have his baby. Then we'll inhereit Disney Land because I'll be the first naturally born man to give birth and you'll all be sorry. Then Chris will have enough money to by the best training and he'll have a bigger bus than that jerk Ed Clay, cause thats what he wants. You'll see, and you'll all be sorry and feel like shit when you see how happy Christopher and I will be, and you won't be stopping our openly gay lifestyle then.
jerks!
I have had the pleasure to train with Masters Chris Garland on many occasions; he is an excellent martial artist.
As a traditional martial artist I have a problem with the MMA crowd (mostly non fighters) talking trash about martial artists.
For the non-fighters, I would like to see you gi up and get in the ring or cage instead of hiding behind your screen name.
BTW have you ever seen a good MMA fighter that is undefeated? Me either… and for the trainer that says you have white belts that can stand in front of Masters Garland, well you might want to train with him first…
Chris you keep doing what you are doing and stay safe…
Yours in Budo,
Dan
I was in Cali. during the said demonstration about the bird killing. I saw the bird jumping around at the bottom of the cage after the demonstration and saw the same on a video of it. By the way, we were not padded up, we had on Kendo Chest Armor at the Martial Arts Hall Of Fame, I've been doing martial arts for over 25 years, and him being able to hit us harder without hurting us only showed to me that he was going to move a little faster and possibly kick hard enough to break ribs. We do know what we will use during most demonstrations, like will I have a knife or gun or bat. We call it unrehearsed because he doesn't know how we are going to use it, and we don't know how he is going to defend against it. It helps you because everyone on the street aren't going to attack you the same way. If you see the video, I'm the African American in it. If the guy who supposedly was there didn't like the demonstration, oh well you can't please everyone. I remember most of the people telling us how much they enjoyed our demo and thanked us for being there. I do remember the kid yelling, but didn't see one person clap. You can find me as Black Samurang on Myspace (myspace.com/mightysilentwarria), also you can find me on blackplanet.com as SILENTWARRIA if you want to contact me. I'm not gonna lie and act like I don't personally know Mr. Garland, because I have trained with him for over 10 Years now. I have had the privilege to go and train with him in Korea with the Grandmasters who tested me for my Black Belts. I had the privilege to assist in the training of some of OUR soldiers and Gov. employees (Navy Seals, Police, SWAT, and Special Forces Green Beret Rangers that visited the school). A lot of them would come paying out of their own pocket because they all had the same claim, that what we teach works on the streets.
Hopefully I also will be able to compete in the MMA matches in the upcoming years whether I win or lose. I'm more of a street fighter and not used to their rules that would hinder me, but I do respect them and I'm trying to learn them in case I do get to fight professionally again. I have nothing personal against Ed Clay and would be honored to meet him as I have come across a few men that say they have trained with him.
To: Pre-Op Teagan, I would guess that you are one of Clay's students or former Garland student trying to get a laugh, but you probably are neither just another lier. From what I hear about Ed Clay, I wouldn't suggest or accuse you of doing it because, heck, you are probably a stand up guy. To the guy who started this blog, just like a lot of others, you should get your facts straight because I'm laughing at this crap and the guy who you quoted. I have my own web group to moderate and probably won't be back soon, but would love to read what you have to say about what I'm writing when I do get the chance.
I had the privilege also to meet and get a couple of drinks with some of the UFC fighters after they fought in Nashville and they were nice guys to be around. We hit the punch game at Coyote Ugly and conversation about martial arts without all the he say she say stuff. I heard that Ed Clay had a lot to do with bringing that to Tennessee, if that is true, Thanks. One of the guys said that he lost, and I don't think that made him a poor martial artist. I just wished him the best in the future. I'm not a Saint, I don't talk mess, I break up a lot of fights which also means that I fight a lot, if you think that I'm fake hit me up and we'll meet.
To: Rambo" Ryan Delorenzo, as always, even though you talked disgracefull about my instructor, I don't feel it necessary to ever lower my self to anyone's level. If you fight heavy weight I would love to compete against you in the ring, but I'd rather it be out of the ring without rules where our style of Hapkido is trained for, real life situations. I fear no man, just God. If you were to win, good for you. If Mr. Garland did say something about a hard on to Ed Clay I'm sure he is intelligent enough to know that was not gay, just the way some fighters speak. Like when Rambo said his thing about raping Mr. Garland, I don't think anyone on here took that anything other that a figure of speech. As a lot of professional fighter do, they talk mess and do the best they can to back it up in the ring. People can view that as bad, but I like to think that they are expressing to the fullest what they want people to understand about how they feel. I saw Mike Tyson say on TV that he was going to eat the other guys children, and after the fight he wished the other fighter good will.
Warhammer I don't know why someone on here was talking mess about you. Whomever it was, they were not there I'm positive to see what ever happened. Chris has a first middle and last name just as most of us in America, he fought under what some call his Christian name. I'm not defending his name, he doesn't need me to, just clearing up what was said. I would love to clear up everything that was said here, but why? People are going to always talk mess, and believe what they want, some true, some not.
I've had the privilege to see Mr. Garland fight when challenged and know that he has handled himself very well outside of the ring. Remember this, I have no ill will towards anyone, if you think you can hurt me, I welcome you to try. It's not hard to find me I'm on Second Ave. downtown Nashville 2 or 4 times a week, so if you want to speak to me or you want me to prove that the martial arts that I do works on anyone. Some of the Security Guards and Managers on Second know me because I used to work with them at different clubs.
I have been called the "N" word, spit on, smacked, and had guys talk bad about my mother in my face. I don't fight because of talk, but I will fight for pay, if someone puts their hands on me, or as most of my fights happen because I see someone get jumped when out numbered. I don't have much money right now so I won't be putting up any to fight anyone, I have Kids of my own to feed. Like I explained to my father, if that was me, getting stomped by 5 guys, wouldn't you want someone to help me.
I hope that I didn't offend anyone, including Mr. Warhammer, Mr. Clay, Mr. Garland, or Mr. Rambo. Everything here is of my own words and came from me. If you want to discuss it find me on Myspace, or if you come across someone who knows me downtown leave your number with them. I'll get back to you or meet you down there.
If any of you want to know my name, it is Jelani.
Be Blessed and Good Luck to Everyone.
Received this in my inbox... hopefully we'll see you all at the Nashville MMA tonight
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Ed Clay vs. Chris Garland :: TONIGHT- April 14.
Ed Clay will fight Nashville's Chris Garland in a one-time only exhibition match, tonight at Nashville MMA, 490 Allied Drive, 5:30pm.
Chris Garland HATES Ed Clay. There is no other way to convey this (unless you want to hear the actual audio conversation at http://www.nashvillemma.com/challenge). I had the chance to speak with Chris today for nearly 30 minutes. Mr. Garland was beyond frustrated and has publicly called Ed out to fight "in a gi, no-gi, scratching, clawing or whatever, any time any place under any rules." So I set the match up for tonight April 14, at mine and Ed's gym located at 490 Allied Drive. There has been a 13+ year fued going on between these guys and Garland wants to settle the score on the mat...
Obviously I am concerned for the safety of Mr. Garland, but he stated that he will sign a liability waiver and that he understands what he's getting into. For tonight, there will be no striking of any kind, nor manipulation of small joints. It will be Ed Clay's BJJ vs. Chris Garlands Karate. The match will last 5 minutes or until one competitor gives up or is tapped out more than 10 times.
This fight is very serious for me because Ed and I are business partners and because I don't want to see Chris get hurt. We take our training very seriously, and I would never, ever accept a challenge like this, because it seems to be a senseless clamor for attention. At the end of the day, however, Chris wants to prove his skills on the mat with Ed and take out his frustration for all these accusations that Ed supposedly (but didn't) make over the past 10 years. This has been brewing for a very long time and this seems to be the only way Chris can settle his anger. I am not sure this is the best course of action, but it's one that Chris wants and considering the publicity this seems to have generated in Nashville, it seems to be the only resolution.
Whatever the result, I personally hope that Mr. Garland gives Ed everything he has tomorrow and that whatever score Chris has to settle, he leaves it on the mat after the match is over. He's obviously an upset guy.
-Shane Messer
For Mr. Messer:
I just talked to Garland-sensei. He is under the impression that this bout is scheduled for 5:30PM Wednesday, 15 April at Mr. Clay's gym. That is tomorrow, not today.
VR
KB
Actually, the fight was supposed to take place today, April 14 at 5:30 pm but Mr. Garland called today and said he would not be able to make it today. After another long conversation, the match has officially been set for Wednesday, April 15th at 5:30 pm at the Nashville Mixed Martial Arts Academy 490 Allied Drive. The sign for the gym blew down but the front of the building says "Lovett Sales" and the gym is at the back of the building.
Regina
Check out Ed Clays video response.
Part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4dPm2YL5WRE
Part 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAu9B11xG_w
TO MR. Ed GAY and his Brokeback boyfriends
1st: Gameness should be called Gayness!!
2nd: your brokeback mountain boyfriends at NMMA need to get a life and stop giving each other the reach around at the gym! Ed, Who's dick are you sucking at the Scene?? you must be really good at it. I'm sure you and the "butthammer" practice everyday on each other. What do you teach gay-jitsu??
3rd: put on a "real" MMA show!! so far all of them sucked!! I was at your last shit ass show at Silverados!! who has an MMA event at a bar that allows smoking?? Can I have my $30 back? it fucking SUCKED!!!!!!!!!
and to the dumb fuck "Rambo" Ryan Delorenzo, what kind of name is that?? you are a dumb fuck!! you look like it, talk like it, and I hope you get your ass knocked out May 2nd!!
Paul Smith
P.S. and to Josh "butthammer" Shockman I called your number so I could tell you this in person but you need to pay your bill first so people can reach you!!
LOL The comedy in this whole thing are the people who really get mad. If you read this blog and it's comments it's hilarious. How can you not laugh???
this guy garland sounds like the guy from that movie "The foot fist way", ive been a mm artist since i was 10 and people like this disgrace the sport. But i gotta admit it is pretty funny how everyone is always trying to show off how tuff they are.LOL
I am a retired teacher. Lately I am feeling degregationproblems with my memory and I am concerned about it. I was considering memory practice, or omega3 fish oil capsuls. What is the best option?
We are wasting time by focusing on the pissing contest between Ed and his boys and the rest of the world.
The funny thing is this...
I've watched the videos of Garland on Youtube and they are drenched with lies.
In one particular fight, the announced proudly proclaims that Garland was orphaned and then raised in Japan by Korean parents.
Funny...He grew up in Hendersonville. Went to my high school. He graduated the year before my freshman year, but he came back to our wrestling practices from time to time to brag about how we was an army ranger, and how he trained the Hendersonville PD sway guys, and the normal run of the mill Garland BS.
I don't know Ed Clay. I know Ed does indeed have a reputation of being a slimy piece of human shit, but whether that is right or wrong is certainly not my decision to make, nor would I opine in such a public fashion on the matter, HOWEVER, if Ed is a snake oil salesman, and a slimy piece of human shit, then Chris Garland is the slimy piece of human shit on the bottom of Ed's slimy piece of human shit foot.
I don't mind going on record about that.
Garland is a liar, and even our wrestling coach knew it back then. He'd tell us to ignore what he says, but that he was a decent wrestler and that there was an off-chance that we could take a thing or two from him.
I never did.
But then again, I didn't want him to use his super-human cyborg Hapkido to deal out permanent damage to me, know what I mean?
