On the radio, Lou Dobbs only sounds orange.
So Eric Crafton went on Lou Dobbs' radio show yesterday and I have to say: all in all, a little disappointing. Yeah, sure, there were some high(low)lights. But somehow, the combination of America's favorite Nativist Creamsicle and Nashville's Somnambulant Xenophobe seemed to promise so much more.
Let's hit this, bullet-point style:
- Mistakenly look for Crafton's interview in first hour of broadcast. Only find teaser coming out of commercial which, interestingly enough, begins with this line from Hootie & the Blowfish's "Only Wanna Be With You": You and me, we come from different worlds. English Only irony?
- Crafton's on, hooray!
- Takes approximately 15 seconds for him to drop the term "liberal elites." Congratulations to all office pool winners.
- Crafton offering Dobbs' listeners a quick English Only summary: "Our boards, commissions and council meetings will be in English. That's really all the measure says." Permission to approach the bench?
- Oooooh, clever framing there Mr. Crafton. First known recording (to my knowledge) of the term "Anti-English" when referring to English Only's opponents. Someone's been cribbing from the Pro-Life playbook.
- Crafton says that the average age of early voters is 55. Correctly assumes that this demographic will vote overwhelmingly in his favor.
- Exit Crafton. Enter callers. Average reaction upon just hearing about Nashville's liberal elite, Anti-English stance: Mindboggled.
- Dean's on, hooray!
- Rightfully points out that amendment language is vague to the point of potentially threatening federal grant money. Dobbs counters by trying to get Dean to say America is f'ing bonkers for forcing state governments to cater to non-English speakers. Creamsicle melt level: getting warmer.
- Dobbs on English Only's true purpose: "It drives a cultural stake in the ground." Somehow this is meant to be a compliment.
- Dobbs and Dean have a brief, uninformative conversation about hypothetical trips to France.
Leads to Dobbs seemingly praising the frog-eaters for being snooty/unwelcoming. What's with the conservative double-standard re: Frenchies? Their either fierce nationalists AND pompous asses or they're none of the above. You can't have it both ways, Dobbs!
- Segment ends.
Final tally: One (1) mention of liberal elites; Two (2) mindboggled callers; Approximately nine (9) minutes of time wasted