Monday, December 8, 2008
Lane Kiffin's Wife Has Site Dedicated to Her by Garden Gnome Posing as Man
Posted by Caleb Hannan on Mon, Dec 8, 2008 at 5:07 AM
An artist's rendering of IWouldDoLaylaKiffin.com's creator.
Let's not anyone get the wrong idea. I have nothing against short men (my dad's a short man!). They are, by nature, genetically superior to us tall gangly types. Especially when it comes to elf impersonation or Carnival Cruiseline limbo contests. Ya know, everyday kind of things.
That being said, I am almost positive that the guy who created IWouldDoLaylaKiffin.com is both figuratively, and literally, a very short man.
Why so sure?
Because it takes a special kind of misogyny, born from years of rejection and countless more years of embittered self-loathing, to create a website answering a question no one would have thought to ask in the first place. Who better to do that than a man who's heard little short on cash quality jokes his entire life?
For those who'd rather not click the link, IWDLK isn't much to look at. Just a hastily composed gallery of photos with Vols wallpaper behind it and a blog tool offering entry into a chat room creepily entitled "Layla." So why bother in the first place?
Sure, Coach Kiffin's wife is an attractive woman (who's also, btw, eight months pregnant). Sure, an anything-goes attitude is part of the internet's charm. But that doesn't mean you should leap at the chance to claim the title of Lowest Common Denominator.
Let's just all agree to observe a simple rule from now on. If you can look your mother in the eye when you tell her the name of your site, by all means continue. If you can't, don't. And if you can't because she towers over you, find a stepstool and try again. Shorty.
Comments (1)
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Caleb, did a short guy ever steal your girlfriend? Are you an anti-shortite? I know plenty of tall, crazed Vol fans who are more than moronic enough to start that site.
(And btw, readers, I am well within the heart of the "average height" curve. In Eastern Asia, at least. Not that there's anything wrong with being short.)
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Posted by
Jack
on 12/08/2008 at 2:25 PM
