Thursday, November 20, 2008
Politics / Silverman U.S. Senate Candidate Hank Williams Jr. Loves Some Cadillac Pussy
Posted by Jack Silverman on Thu, Nov 20, 2008 at 7:30 AM
She had some Cadillac pussy Some Cadillac pussy She had some Cadillac pussy She had some Cadillac pussy Man it would drive you wildNow seriously, do you think Lamar Alexander knows the first thing about Cadillac pussy? I highly doubt it. Maybe he's down with that uptight Mercedes pussy, but who needs that? And Corker? He's a Camry pussy guy at best. Sure, maybe The New York Times was right about our on'ry, ignernt, redneck ways. But I'm tired of fighting to keep my liberal, diversity-appreciating, woman-respecting ideals intact down here in Dixie. Hank II, you can count on my vote. And those of you still clinging to your failed socialist ideology, don't you dare think of using this as some sort of Jeremiah Wright moment to scare those God-fearing, church-going masses in small-town Tennessee who might be offended by Hank's repeated use of the word "pussy" to refer to a woman's genitalia. Those kind of negative campaign tactics don't work around here, my friends. "I'm Hank Williams Jr. and I approved this pus...um, I mean, message."
Comments (13)
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I'm more concerned about what exactly a Cadillac pussy is and how I can discern whether I have one. Does having a Cadillac pussy mean one has the kind of pussy old people like to get in and putter around real slow? Is it the kind of pussy that tries to lure in young professional women by insinuating that getting in a pussy like that will prove she's better than the boys in the office? Is it the kind of pussy that, when strapped for cash, heads to Washington?
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Aunt B., you raise some interesting questions, but I feel it would be both inappropriate and presumptuous of me to make any sort of comment regarding your cooterial region. (Is that what they mean by "regional humor"?)
And allow me to add that, with the many hats I wear around here (most of them funny-looking), I don't get nearly the time I'd like to roam the blogosphere. But after enjoying the last 20 minutes at Tiny Cat Pants, I've added it to my "heavy rotation" list. (And I've added the "Put a Ring on It" dance to my morning workout.)
I was wondering exactly what Aunt B was wondering, plus a couple other thoughts. Is it a Cadillac pussy if it's featured in blues songs? Or if it takes up two parking spaces at HG Hill's? Or maybe it's a gash that goes 45,000 trouble-free miles, then expires and sits in the driveway (as ours did in'80) until we pay to have it hauled away.
And I feel like I have extra reason to be concerned because like a Cadillac, my pussy, along with the rest of me, was made in Michigan! If rappers are suddenly going to start trying to diamond-encrust it, I want fair warning, that's all I'm saying. I'm not saying I'd turn that down; I just don't want to have it happen unexpectedly.
Jack, glad you found Tiny Cat Pants enjoyable. I do what I can.
Get your liberal, God-hating, pro gay-marrying mind out of the gutter, Jack. The song is about the nice lady's cat.
BTW, I suggest not drinking liquids while reading Tiny Cat Pants. The spit takes are a bitch.
Mary, Mary, you're quite contrary.
I crack myself up.
Now why don't you go back to your little "make the world a better place" thingy, or whatever it is that you do.
That song is clearly about the problems with the American auto industry and how we need to change our thinking about transportation. The woman in question is eventually "Talked on the bus" because reliable mass transit is better both economically and environmentally. Cadillac pussy may drive you wild, but public transit keeps everyone movin!
Williams is too ignorant and arrogant to consider that a serious interest in public service begins at the school board, council district or local/county government level. If either Frist or Alexander were assisting Hank, the conversation would have to begin with such a bit of honesty.
I couldn’t reach Bill Frist on November 21st, though representatives from Alexander’s office and the Tennessee Republican Party told me that day they had no knowledge of any conversation Hank had with either Frist or Alexander.
Hank got much face time on the campaign trial with Sarah Palin, but that didn’t translate into any recognition for Williams at the national level. With a CNN camera steadied on Palin and Williams in the same frame(s) during a campaign rally televised on Larry King Live during the closing days of the election, King didn’t even mention Hank’s name!
Republicans aren’t stupid enough to be taken in by Williams’ star power and the NAACP would be on the warpath if the GOP was that gullible, ‘cause, thankfully, heaven ain’t a lot like the Dixie Hank embraces.
Further, Williams wouldn’t want to relive the controversy of, nor would Tennessee’s GOP want to have to defend, the lyrics of Hank’s recording of If the South Would’ve Won. (Check out those lyrics if you want an idea of what Willliams’ platform would be.)
Why didn’t CMT's Hazel Smith ask Hank if he is aware that the next primary election won’t be until 2012? And, being such a good friend of Williams’, why didn’t she remind Hank that any suggestion that he has floated his candidacy past Frist and Alexander seems a little sinister when there is no mention of any courtesy call to the incumbent, Senator Bob Corker, Hank’s 2012 Republican primary opponent should Corker seek re-election?
Hank should be talking with Tom T. Hall.
Three decades ago, Tom floated and rescinded his candidacy for governor of the state of Tennessee, during the course of little more than a single day, following an embarrassing exchange between Hall’s former Hee-Haw “colleague,” Teddy Bart, then a Channel 2 news anchor, and John Jay Hooker. (During a newscast split-screen hookup, Bart rhetorically asked Hooker re: Tom's candidacy: "Are the Democrats that desperate?")
Tom’s publicist at that time told me shortly after the self-abortive fiasco that Hall, rarely an angry drunk, called her, following what appeared to be some heavy drinking, demanding to know how the story got out. “You told me to release it,” she told me she reminded him.
Stacy Harris
Publisher/Executive Editor
Stacy's Music Row Report
http://www.geocities.com/stacy.harris/report.html
I love Bocephus as much I love just about anything, but there's NO WAY I'd vote him to go to the Senate. No chance in hell.
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