Thursday, August 7, 2008

Just Ask God: No one Parties like Marsha Blackburn

Posted by Pete Kotz on Thu, Aug 7, 2008 at 5:08 AM

click to enlarge Marsha_20Blackburn.gif
Join Marsha tonight for a fun-filled evening of patriotism and automatic weapons.
Marsha Blackburn will be hosting an “Election Night Victory Rally” tonight at Mere Bulles in Brentwood. It promises to be a family-friendly affair with loads of games for the kids. Beginning at 7:30 p.m., Marsha will personally judge the teen marksmanship competition, in which male interior decorators will be set free in the banquet room. The first contestant to gun them all down before they escape and force their alternative lifestyle on others will receive a Bible and a Mac-10. The NRA will also be on hand to give away free targets depicting Barack Obama talking to a white woman. At 8 p.m. comes the big finale. Marsha will be sacrificing illegal Mexican virgins to the accompaniment of fireworks and a John Philip Sousa medley, performed by the Harry Kaczinski Orchestra. But make your reservations early! Seats are limited, and the offer is only good while supply of virgins lasts. For more information, contact Darcy Anderson at darcy@votemarsha.com.

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Meanwhile, the Scene's Red Brigades crew will be at their weekly get together down at the Nashville Commie Pinko Center (aka the Nashville Peace and Justice Center). They'll be wearing their Chairman Mao t-shirts, reading selected passages from his little red book and reminiscing about the "good old days" of the cultural revolution.

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Posted by Gilbert Martin on August 7, 2008 at 7:49 AM

Kotzie...Were you this loony at your last gig?

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Posted by Emmett Flatus on August 7, 2008 at 9:48 AM

Once again your "open mindedness" shines through in your article written by pete kotz about Marsha Blackburn. You're so smug and sarcastic that it reeks. In this "politically correct world where you can't say anything against anyone it's open season on Christians and Conservatives and that's o.k because? Because they don't agree with your view point. You so called journalist spew out your empty opinion expecting everyone to fall in line. And when they don't, well they're just stupid white trash Christian that desperately cling to they're guns and bibles. Your propaganda is so thick a conservative's shot gun could not shoot through it. America is a great country. Only in America could predictable sheep like you make a living with your dribble.

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Posted by k on August 7, 2008 at 9:59 AM

There are sheep on both sides k. And there are plenty of conservatives who aren't christian.

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Posted by burrito on August 7, 2008 at 10:29 AM

See, now that is satire. Unlike Pulle's sad efforts where he alters quotes and press releases to further some wierd agenda, this is good clean fun.
P.S. Gilbert- That might have been worth a chuckle in 1978. The funny thing is you probably really do still see the world that way....

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Posted by ScottJ on August 7, 2008 at 10:34 AM

No the funny thing is that someone who refers to Kotz's post as "good clean fun" is attempting to lecture me about what's good satire.

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Posted by Gilbert Martin on August 7, 2008 at 11:15 AM

Sorry, Gilbert, but as a good son of America, I feel it my patriotic duty to make fun of Marsha. We're living in times where costs of the staples of life -- food, housing, health, transport, heat -- are soaring higher than I can count with a public school education. And Marsha wants to yammer about guns and gay marriage? If you add in aides and offices, etc., she's spending a few million a year of taxpayer money to do this. We already tried this game in 2004, and look where it got us.
Let us rise against them, Gilbert! And if you can find a local lefty this dogmatic, we will spear them with our mirth as well!

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Posted by Kotz on August 7, 2008 at 12:25 PM

"We're living in times where costs of the staples of life -- food, housing, health, transport, heat -- are soaring higher than I can count with a public school education. And Marsha wants to yammer about guns and gay marriage?"
Very cute, Pete. Of course Marsha actually talks about and votes on a lot more issues that - as you already know. But considering the fact that a lot of those high prices for energy, food, etc. are caused by government meddling in the first place - bans on drilling for oil, ethanol mandates, farm price supports, subsidies and protectionist tarrifs on imports, we would be a lot better off if ALL the politicians spent most of their time yammering about guns and gay marriange instead of meddling in the economy.
If the Scene isn't paying you enough for playing smirky hipster on the blog to cover your gas bill, go out and get a real job that pays enough to cover it and quit looking for government to be your mommy and take care of it for you.
"And if you can find a local lefty this dogmatic, we will spear them with our mirth as well!"
Check the mirror and you'll find your target.

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Posted by Gilbert Martin on August 7, 2008 at 1:53 PM

Marsha is a great, God-fearing American and nothing YOU say can prove otherwise! Suck on that, punk-ass! Vote Marsha and not commie pinko Democrat!

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Posted by Gilbert, Jr. on August 7, 2008 at 5:09 PM

The satire is great, but the fact that it is true is also sad. Marsha Blackburn should be ejected from Congress with a quickness. The problem with conservatives is that they have nothing good to stand on from their Bush on down, so they have to talk about guns and gays. Their handymen like O'Reilly, Hannity, Savage, Coulter these hate of liberals to prey on weak minded people who walk into a church and begin shooting during a children's presentation. Funny that the conservatives had nothing to say about the deaths their backward, hatred filled agenda caused.

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Posted by yellow dog on August 7, 2008 at 5:15 PM

sigh, if they were only brains.
No, wait, maybe not because then she would be even more dangerous.
sigh, if they were only real.

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Posted by Alise on August 8, 2008 at 6:03 AM
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