I have very important and breaking news to discuss.
So I went home for lunch, made myself a sandwich and turned on the television. When I watch TV, always flip to MTV in vain hope that they will actually play real music videos instead of the next episode of the Real World/Road Rules Hot Tub Marathon Challenge
, or whatever it is they have these days. I don't know why I do it. I also look through the Beatles section every time I'm in a CD store, in irrational hope that they've put out a new album. I know it's a fruitless search, but I have to do it anyway.
Today, I turned to MTV just as they started their 90-second "MTV News Flash" thingy that they sometimes air during commercial breaks. Apparently Coldplay
has a new single (and soon-to-be new album) coming out. That's what MTV wanted to tell me. Well whoop-de-doo. But that's not what bothered me. What bothered me was the fact that MTV referred to Coldplay as "one of the biggest bands in the world."
Coldplay? The lighter, gentler, slightly more boring Radiohead rip-off? Whose first single, about a primary color, might have been mistaken for a melodic children's song? They've sold 17 million albums and won four Grammys, but (until the new album comes out), only have two records. Can two records make you one of the biggest bands in the world? Maybe so. But they're so...bland. What happened to the music industry?
I don't dislike Coldplay. I don't care one way or the other about their music, actually. And at least they write their own songs. But somehow, I don't like the idea that such a boring band can be one of the "biggest in the world." Boo MTV. Boo on you for saying that.
Oh, and if you do
like Coldplay, you'll be happy to know that the new single (which isn't actually out yet) is already a cellular phone ringtone
Oh yeah, and...