Saturday, April 30, 2005

Big Government

Posted By on Sat, Apr 30, 2005 at 9:40 PM

Is today Government Intrusion Day? Is that always the day after Labor Day? I can never keep track of minor holidays.

First I learned that lapdances -- one of the things that make America great -- will be effectively outlawed in Nashville come August 1. Then I headed to the drugstore and discovered that -- thanks to the "Meth-Free Tennessee" Act -- in order to get the perfectly legal over-the-counter medication necessary to stave off the near-constant sinus headaches that are my reward for having moved here five years ago, I must now request it from the pharmacist personally, show ID and sign a form.

So by about 6 o'clock today I had learned that my city government assumes I'm a sexual predator who can't be trusted to get within a yard (literally) of a nearly-naked female, while my state government figures I must be a meth fiend if I'm buying Tavist-D. Nice.

Then I saw Guy Clark at Kroger and thought, hey, Nashville isn't so bad -- at least I get to shop for my Diet Coke and Soy Crisps next to the man who wrote "Desperados Waiting for a Train."

I just hope he didn't have a sinus headache. The pharmacy was closed.

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