Besides the inevitable general boozin’ and cruisin’ to partake in, a shit-hot lineup of garage, punk, comedy and DJs — featuring Fucked Up, King Khan and the Shrines, The Soft Pack, Thee Oh Sees, The Dirtbombs, Quintron and Miss Pussycat, Neil Hamburger, newly minted Ty-Segall-co-fronted garage supergroup The Togas, Vivian Girls and DJ Mr. Jonathan Toubin — should put a coup de grace on hard-sellin’ you on plunging your pocketbook into this sea-borne sock-hop.
But if seeing, say, The Dirtbombs (who haven’t come to Nashville in three years) or Thee Oh Sees (who, inexplicably, have still never graced the ‘Ville with their raucous California garage-psych) while on a Miami-to-Bahama Carnival Cruise isn’t bait enough to reel you on board, Stein has sent the Scene a sprawling press release announcing an array of other incentives (itemized below). Seriously, for such an unabashed, spliff-on-sleeve stoner, Stein is one helluva hard worker. So, like, don’t even think about pulling a mutiny on his proverbial Bounty, or he’ll go Captain Bligh on your ass and chart his way back to Miami by memory to send you adrift on canoe to Cuba.
Anyway, read the latest in Bruise Cruise news after the jump:
* If you’re super-sold on this rock ’n’ roll vaycay for the ages, but your paycheck-to-paycheck financial profile is sitting dormant like a bloodless stone at the moment, you might want to consider the festival’s “Cruise Now and Pay Later” option, which allows you to reserve yourself a cabin on the ship with a $250 deposit of the full $695-$760-per-cabin fee you’ll owe later on down the line. Cabins sleep two people, FYI, and said fee includes your meals and a lot of your booze. Also, for those traveling solo, the cruise will host “several events encouraging singles to mingle.” So be sure to bring condoms.
* If you’re feeling as lucky as you are poor, consider entering into Flavor Pill’s Bruise Cruise Cabin Giveaway Contest.
* And if you’re on a contest kick, consider trying your artist’s hand and entering the cruise’s Design a Bruise Cruise Postcard Contest. If your design prevails, it will be as a promotional item for the event. And you, the winner, will prevail upon an autographed box set of limited edish Bruise Cruise Records and a tote bag brimming with “Bruiser Apparel.”
* Speaking of records, the festival’s label, Bruise Cruise Records, will soon release a round of limited-edish vinyl that attendees will find themselves furnished with upon boarding. The next 10 of those attendees to sign up will receive a reward in the form of a currently unreleased Neil Hamburger 7-inch. Check out the artwork for it (below) — it’s hilarious.
* Also hilarious is the simple fact that this West Indies vacation includes a dry-land event — The Bruise Cruise Bahamas Island Party at, not kidding, Senor Frogs in Nassau. The par-tay will feature drink specials and conga lines, in addition to performances by Fucked Up, The Soft Pack, The Togas and, naturally, funnyman Neil Hamburger. Check out the flier (below) — it’s hilarious.
* I’m guessing some of you don’t have passports, which I suppose is an insurmountable stumbling block in setting out on this bruisin’, boozin’ voyage. However, such status is no excuse to keep you out of New York City, where, during this month’s CMJ Music Marathon, the Bruise Cruise and Panache Booking will host a showcase at Brooklyn’s Public Assembly set to feature sets by Shonen Knife, Cheeseburger, White Fence, PUJOL, Bleached, Vockah Redu, Turbo Fruits, Jacuzzi Boys, Idiot Glee and Chapter 24.
* And speaking of NYC-related cruise news, New York photog Jackie Roman has released Teenage Rampage! Volume II, a photo essay on the event. Purchase it in print or digital form here. The cover photo is of Black Lips’ Jared Swilley. See for yourself:
* Tired of images and want to see a video? Here’s a Soft Pack Clip promoting the cruise.
* Sick of visuals and ready for some sound? Well the cruise has got the sonic front covered with help from Quintron, who will debut his waterproof, mobile Swamp Stack signature sound system at BC2012. It apparently looks like this:
That’s not enough info for you? Then surf on over to Cruise’s official site for more deets.