Monday, November 15, 2010

Danny Gokey Marks Territory in Green Hills

Posted By on Mon, Nov 15, 2010 at 2:35 PM


Faith in Christ does not flush toilets, at least not for Danny Gokey. According to a Facebook status update posted last night by an unnamed employee of an unnamed, upscale tea store — a tea-tery, if you will — in the Green Hills Mall, bespectacled contemporary Christian country singer and eighth season American Idol third place finalist, Danny Gokey, had an epic fail in the common courtesy department when he neglected to flush a store toilet after relieving himself yesterday. A screen cap of said update appears above. The names of the innocent have been blacked out, but the name of the accused remains.

When asked if Gokey’s crime was of the brown or yellow variety, the Scene’s unnamed source — who asked to be referred to as Tea Girl, but who I’d like to refer to as Teap Throat — said:

Numbah one. With lots of hair gel and pendants.

Teap Throat did not mention whether there were two sets of footprints facing the toilet or just one. But before going to let his yellow mellow over at Green Hills Mall, the teetotaling singer Tweeted yesterday morning:

Jesus your all I need. All that I am is yours. Your all I need.

While I’m not sure if he’s talking about Jesus’ “all I need,” or if he’s using Jesus as a verb, hence telling his fans to Jesus their respective “all I needs,” I do think next time he goes to hit an upscale public restroom, Gokey should ask himself, “What would Jesus do?”

He’d flush.

Radiohead's "All I Need."

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