It isn’t enough that the woman who shunned him in high school is unhappy. No, Keith has to luxuriate in the mental image of a wife and mother weeping so loudly that her children can hear her and be devastated by the horror show their family life has become. One can only imagine how much unseemly glee Keith would take in the children growing up to be commitment-phobic basket cases who require around-the-clock counseling and heavy-duty antidepressants to help them deal with early formative traumas. And it all could have been avoided if their mother had only seen Keith’s boundless potential and maybe given him a handjob.
Life is easy, when you think about it. [A.V. Club]