I know what you're thinking: "Rodgers, you must have stumbled across some sort of fake blog-post title generator and created the above nonsensical headline." Guess again. This shit is most definitely real, my friends. The King of Horror Fiction has teamed up with the King of Having an Awesome Animal for a Middle Name and Sounding Like the Boss in order to create a roughly two-hour musical theater collaboration.
In addition to premiering in Atlanta in September of this year, Ghost Brothers of Darkland County will also be released as "a book including a CD recording of the songs" (produced by the ever-collaboratin' T-Bone Burnett, no less) some time prior to the play's opening. From King's website:
The story involves domestic turmoil, and is played by a stellar cast led by Kris Kristofferson, in the role of Joe, the father, and Elvis Costello, as the satanic character The Shape. Rosanne Cash plays Monique, the mother, with the sons enacted by Will Daily (Frank), Dave Alvin (Jack), Alvin's real-life brother Phil Alvin (Andy) and John (Drake).
Sheryl Crow stars as Jenna and Neko Case is Anna, with boxing legend Joe Frazier playing caretaker Dan Coker and Stephen King himself in the role of Uncle Steve. The narrator is "24" star Glenn Morshower.
While Mellencamp has said, "It won't be 'Jack and Diane' meets Cujo," I'd like to think it will be like "Hurts So Good" meets Pet Sematary: Kristofferson, distraught after a late-onset mid-life crisis, begins a romantic relationship with the re-animated corpse of Sheryl Crow.
No? What about "Pink Houses" meets The Shining? In that one, Joe Frazier plays a black man with a black cat living in a black neighborhood who one day discovers that he can communicate telepathically with a demonic little boy played by Elvis Costello. Sheryl Crow and Neko Case portray a spooky pair of twins.
OK...maybe "Rain on the Scarecrow" meets Children of the Corn? That one's just like Children of the Corn, only the town is abandoned because of the economic downturn--not because of a pint-sized, murderous cult. Mellencamp plays Isaac.
Fine, fine. All of my ideas suck. I'm sure the Edgar Allan Poe of the 20th century and the "Springsteen of the Midwest" (thanks Gold) will be able to come up with something. Click here to see what Mellencamp says the play will actually be about.