Thursday, October 29, 2009
Creamtastic Rod Stewart Dead at 33 [Updated]
Posted by Adam Gold on Thu, Oct 29, 2009 at 10:31 AM
Most of you don't know this, but former Faces singer Rod Stewart died mysteriously in 1978, his death initially made evident upon the release of the disco-infused Blondes Have More Fun LP--if you've ever wanted to hear what the soul being sucked out of a man sounds like, then I recommend giving it a spin. Since then, the devil himself has channeled his messages through the zombified golden pipes of the English rocker. The proof is in the pudding.The Anakin Skywalker of rock singers, Stewart was blessed with perhaps the finest voice ever bequeathed to a white man--some guys have all the luck--yet has spent the lion's share of his career using those God-given powers for evil instead of good, singing unspeakably sappy vapid crap. At "64" his voice is still pitch-perfect and the amount of great music he could've made, but didn't, is criminal. Consequently, he is one of the most critically maligned figures in rock history: the archetype of the commercial sellout. This point was best made by legendary rock critic Greil Marcus who once said: "Rarely has a singer had as full and unique a talent as Rod Stewart; rarely has anyone betrayed his talent so completely."
Since Stewart's outright soullessness has long since been established by nearly every rock critic to come before me, you might wonder why I've now decided to throw my hat into the ring of condemnation. The answer is simple: After three decades of slobbering on Satan's salty, sweaty ballsack, Stewart was recently given a brief opportunity to redeem himself--if only for a night--and he totally blew it.
[Update: Contrary to what was reported by The Guardian U.K., Undercover, Channel 4, Gigwise, MOG, Spinner and Consequence of Sound, the Mel. C. and Kiki Dee performances were independent of The Faces portion of the show. According to commenters who attended the event and as reported on Clash Music, The Faces performed three songs on which they were joined by Andy Fairweather Low, Paul Carrack and Mick Hucknall. Mel. C didn't sing for The Faces. Thank God.]
(In other news: "Don't Go Breaking My Heart" singer Kiki Dee is still alive.)
Seriously though, why is a Spice Girl still famous enough to set foot on the Royal Albert Hall stage, let alone in the company of three Faces and two Rolling Stones? I thought British people were supposed to be smart.
If you're wondering why Stewart was a non-participant, he's claiming it's because he's busy promoting his newest blow against musical heritage: Soulbook--where he treats listeners to vanilla renditions of soul classics. This is, of course, consistent with the model set forth by his Great American Songbook and Still the Same releases earlier this decade. Although I've not yet heard it, I'm willing to bet that Soulbook makes the Michael McDonald Motown tribute records look like Songs in the Key of Life.
For me, hearing any post-1978 Rod Stewart material--with the exception of the anomalously awesome 1981 cut "Young Turks"-- is like being forced to confront a childhood abuser. The Faces material, as well as any solo record predating Foot Loose & Fancy Free is absolutely timeless, though, and still totally rocks in the face of all Stewart's ladder-career transgressions. It's really a shame that he couldn't escape the clutches of mediocrity for just one night to save the reunited Faces from falling into the hands of the guy who sang that vanilla cover of "If You Don't Know Me by Now." To me, this is definitive proof of Rod Stewart's Faustian pact with the devil. Who ever could've thought there was hope for rock 'n' roll?
Comments (47)
Showing 1-47 of 47
I agree with everything here except that "Blondes" is entirely awful. While most of it sucks, "Do Ya Think I'm Sexy" is a great song, that bass line is killer.
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I always enjoy playing Faces for someone who's never heard them and only knows Rod for a douche.
That does suck about the reunion.
It's funny but I've never heard put quite like that. I mean you're absolutely correct in your assessment but I've never once heard it said in such strong terms. Couldn't agree more (and I'm likely around you're parents age).
I don't car what you say gold, but Rod The Mod's vocals on the Jeff Beck version of "Old Man River" absolve him of all latter day sins.
Gold: well written defense that Rod Stewart is a softy. But is a front man/woman completely obligated to revisit his/her ex-band on stage? Blondie wouldn't play with her band at the Rock n Roll hall of fame induction and Ric Ocasek passed on the Cars, granted the ersatz Todd Rundgren was "born to synthesize." The Faces were awesome but Rod is not necessarily a bogue for having other plans that night (or any night for that matter).
yeah, dude. or how about that time Robert Palmer wouldn't perform with Power Station? or that time Phil Collins had to fill in for Peter Gabriel on the Genesis reunion? and don't even get me started on Glen Danzig.
Gold, just admit you're jeals cause your career will never be as diverse and long-lived as Rod Stewart's and that's the only reason you ever dislike anything.
The thing is, anything that he could've had on his agenda would've been yet another crime against music and humanity, the Faces reunion was the first opportunity he's had in years to actually do something cool, and he blew it. He really owed it to himself as much as anybody else. Most reunions are terrible, so I think it's far from obligatory for most aged rock stars to go through with them. Rod, on the other hand, is skating on such thin ice that he owes us at least one go around with something worth hearing.
Hi Adam,
The information on the Faces PRS show is incorrect. The guest singers were as follows:
Andy Fairweather Low - "Ooh La La"
Ian McLagan & Paul Carrack - "Cindy Incidentally"
Mick Hucknall - "Stay With Me"
Could you please correct this? Btw, Mick Hucknall rocked out and hit the high notes like nobody's business.
Lynne
(Ian McLagan's manager)
@Lynne Rossi, What is there to correct? I said "In Stewart's absence vocal duties were handled by a slew of guest performers including Simply Red's Mick Hucknall, Kiki Dee and, wait for it...Spice Girls' Mel C." Notice the word including in that sentence?
http://www.guardian.co.uk/music/2009/oct/21/faces-reunite-without-rod-stewart
"Soulbook makes the Michael McDonald Motown tribute records look like Songs in the Key of Life."
And I KNOW that's right!
Beautiful writing, there my man.
If you keep writing things this entertaining, there won't be anything for the trolls to complain about.
Gold, you are dead on. I've been ranting about this to my friends for years. Rod Stewart... the soulful rocker who recorded such great blues tunes like "I'd Rather Go Blind" and all kinds of great Sam Cooke and Chuck Berry covers... and great tunes like "You Wear it Well"... has given it all up for pop garbage. I don't understand this whole lounge thing he's had going for a few years. How does the man sleep at night?
You know, the only question I have is, does he still kick soccer balls into the audience when he does the lounge songs act?
I'm in the mood for a melody Im in the mood for a melody I'm in the moooooooooood!
Ha! Great article.
I did read though that Rod is considering a Faces reunion next year, if so I'll be there.
Fugazi, Faces and the Boss, good taste!
"Fucking Sporty Spice was singing for The Faces."
Lynne Rossi was right, inaccurate sensasionalist reporting of the worst kind. I was at that gig and the guys rocked. Yeah of course everyone was disappointed that Rod didn't show, and if your article had just said that, fair enough. But take a listen to the Sessions Box set, blows the Rod was dead at 33 theory right out of the water. I wish he'd write again, course I do, but at 64 and after a career as long and as varied as his, he can do whatever the hell he likes.
Fucking awesome, I was just thinking this yesterday while listening to Gasoline Alley.
and according to the bbc:
"Other performers will include ex-Spice Girl Melanie C, Georgie Fame, Kiki Dee and Mick Hucknall of Simply Red."
just sayin'
Every report of this gig mentions Mel C. Is there something that needs to be clarified to the media as whole?
"Every report of this gig mentions Mel C. Is there something that needs to be clarified to the media as whole? "
What needs to be clarified is you don't know what you're talking about. The Faces closed the show, performing three songs as outlined by Lynne:
Andy Fairweather Low - "Ooh La La"
Ian McLagan & Paul Carrack - "Cindy Incidentally"
Mick Hucknall - "Stay With Me"
Every report you evidently read is wrong and, therefore, so are you. Mel C playing at the same gig in an unrelated set does not make her a replacement for Rod Stewart, does it?
Is there anything else you would like spelled out and stapled to your forehead?
Hmmmmm, this IS well written and funny, but the whole everything-Rod Stewart-did-after-1975-sucked rant is hogwash that's often used by lazy critics. Yes, Blondes Have More Fun is an awful album, yes Love Touch sucked, yes the Songbooks were mediocre at best and painful at worst (It's a song-by-song basis with those albums, These Foolish Things ((which Sam Cooke himself did))and A Nightengale Sang In Bekley Square, to name two are very good.), and finally, yes Still the Same (his 2006 "rock" album) was the most disappointing release of his entire career. HOWEVER, when you start lumping decent albums like Vagabond Heart (1991) and Out of Order (1988), two albums that many critics correctly praised, in with the crap, you lose credibility. Furthermore the new "soul" album, which isn't really soul at all, is actually decent. Now perhaps Rod has lowered the bar so much over the past 8 years with the Songbooks and STS that I am easily impressed but I found it to be quite enjoyable. As I said it's not soul but that marvelous voice sounds sincere again.
And there is also a Rod Stewart Album rule that states no matter how bad the album is on the whole, there is always at least ONE song that makes you go, "damn this guys is good." On Blondes it was a track called Scarred and Scared. Satan's not capable of coming up with one that's that good!
If you think I am wrong about lazy critics just blindly panning everything Rod's done...I can find you plenty of irresponsible critics who praise his early stuff (as is the rule)but lump Young Turks into the "crap" category just as you are doing with everything else (And I agree with you that Turks is awesome, just not as abnomalous as you say.....)
Sounds like, by and large, you agree with my sentiments. "Out of Order"is the record that includes his deplorable cover of "Forever Young." 'Nuff said there.
I gather you're a fan who, despite constant disappointment, still follows his career, chasing for that one song. I can respect that. Especially when you're able to both appreciate and criticize simultaneously.
Unfortunately it'll probably only get worse for Rod the Mod. Rod's fatal flaw has always been that he plays it too safe. With the success of this covers albums model it's really hard to see that changing anytime soon, as it seems like Stewart is content with being the best cruise ship singer in the world. Sadly, we'll always know that he is capable of so much more.
When Rod is as lazy an artist as you are a journalist he will have something to worry about. You whine about Rod not putting any effort in when you fail to find out even the basic facts of what you are reporting.
God Bless your lovely parents. I hope you all have a very Happy Hannukah and Rod music plays for all 8 days as the menorah candles burn brightly. Donna in AR
Get your facts straight - Ok to have your opinion but get your S**T together. I happened to see seom footoge of the RAH show and it was pretty good.
wtg Alison and JD. Repeating misinformation, and basing an opinion from it, is beyond sloth.
As for Donna, hate comments are repugnant, and so are you. AR already has a bad name, and you seem happy as a pig in shit to help sustain the image.
On any given night during the early seventies, The Faces were the second best rock band on the planet. The Stones will always be the best in my book, however these guys flat out rocked. Then suddenly, Rod Stewart went disco. He has completely sucked ever since. Today, he has become some kind of Barry Manilow old lady crooner. What a watse!
gold you just lost all your glitter
i realised you were just a knob who knows not waht he is talking aboot,,,
FOREVER YOUNG A cover proves you have as much credubility to wrote this artucle as Posh SPICE
IF YOU WANT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY DO YOR HOME WORKS
The PRS event included a variety of artists performing throughout the night. However, the finale during the Faces set did not include Mel C or Kiki Dee in Rod's absence. As stated above, the singers who joined the Faces were Mick Hucknall, Andy Fairweather Low, and Paul Carrack with Ian McLagan sharing lead vocals. The statements in the above article and other media reports on the net are misleading and inaccurate. I'm just saying give credit where it's due, and not misconstrue the actual events. Mel C did not sing with the Faces. I was there in the audience to witness the event.
Lynne
As Adam mentioned I was a DIE HARD Rod Stewart Fan. He had great charisma on stage and a voice unlike all others. You will notice I said "had". I just saw him perform on Jimmy Kimmel and he was pitiful. That once great unique voice no longer exists, it was weak and he sounded as if he was straining to get the vocals out. It's no wonder he was a no show as it would have been too embarrassing and trying to do cover songs just doesn't work for him. I enjoyed his first standard album and although I bought #2 & 3 they were redundant and boring. I would rather listen to Steve Tyrell. Rod's lost it and until he starts hanging with ladies his own age & height that don't zap his energy, he may never find it again. Adam Gold, I promise never to burden you with his music again but you can't stop me from singing along to the still great John Fogerty or rocking out to the Stones.
Great writing and you only used the "F" word twice.
How can an article written full of inaccuracy be taken seriuosly,
thats a simple question
Sorry for the trauma, but we did catch a soccer ball at one of the concerts which you thereafter gleefully kicked around for a while--I did not know you were kicking in his face(s) from the experience. Ok, only U2 and Bruce at Thanksgiving--but may try to sneak in the Stones, unless you have been traumatized by them too.
What?
Getting ma and pa to defend this crap.
I cannot believe I just wasted minutes of life to yet again read an article form some idiot who doesn't check facts? Typical media.
I wonder what the next guy's article will look like if this one is a reference?
To Dave M...you absolutely misunderstood the meaning of my comment... Mr. Gold mentions the upcoming holdays and also that he is jewish. People (like myself) that are familliar with jewish traditions knows that Hanukkah is celebrated with the lighting of a menorah. I can't believe I'm actually defending myself to the likes of you, but apparently you think mentioning anything pertaining to Judiasm is wrong or bad. The meaning of what I wrote was complimenting his parents on choosing to play Rod Stewart for the Holidays, Geez
If we're really going to be honest here, Rod Stewart redeemed himself with critics when he released Out of Order. The album led to a period of career revival- as well as huge critical and commercial success- that also included Vagabond Heart, Storyteller, and Unplugged.
The fact that you dismiss that whole period- simply because it's not your thing- invalidates this argument. It only illustrates that people who hate Rod are going to hate him no matter what. It also underscores the futility of trying to please critics. One person's rave review is usually another's idea of selling out.
Rod could regroup with The Faces for a year and people would still complain. What most of them really want is to be young again, and that's never going to happen. Actually, The Faces did regroup- with Ronnie Lane in tow- back in 1986. Predictably, it did absolutely nothing for those who hated Rod's then-current album.
Yes, Rod has made some terrible, mind-numbing, truly awful choices over the years- but at least they have been his choices. He's usually the first to admit and laugh at them. Ultimately, this is a guy that just likes to have a good time and sing whatever he wants- and he's been that way from the beginning.
So I can't really fault him for not wanting to live in the past. Even when he does try to revisit his roots- as he did in the wake of Unplugged or by recently opening the 'vaults'- the albums don't sell very well. Most of his critics probably don't really care what kind of music he sings- they just like to have something to complain about.
I have a feeling Rod figured that out long ago.
A long time ago, Rod Stewart earned the right to do what he likes in music. So he chooses to "calm it down" a bit.
Yes... it is disappointing for fans who would prefer to see him crawl exhausted from yet another tour date.. but remember the recovery takes longer as you get older...
So The Faces missed him... they missed him doing vocals that he last delivered like that over 20 odd years ago. I think he chose the right option as he could have ended up with egg on his face, struggling to deliver the strength of vocals expected by the fans and by The Faces.
So he chose to record some favourite Soul songs... just like many others around him are doing... and what a lovely job he has made of it, delivering softly polished vocals with a bit of style and a lot of class on an album worth listening to before being commented on.
I am just delighted he keeps doing SOMETHING rather than the nothing he might have chosen at any time in his career... and the bonus of a few real gems is always worth the wait.
PS... although not a big fan of Mick Hucknall, he absolutely NAILED "If You Don't Know Me By Now" and did the same with "You Make Me Feel Brand New". No vanilla there, mate. Just class.
Actually,although I didn't notice the Spice woman, Kiki Dee was definitely there rocking out with Woody during the finale performance of Stay With Me.
Oh for Gods sake, the Faces did the three songs as detailed earlier. Then there was the presentation of awards , and then, right at the end of the whole gig there was the finale song a la live aid which was a repeat of stay with me and all of the acts that had been part of this charity gig, including Kiki Dee and Mel C were on the stage. That doesn't mean that that either Kiki Dee or Mel C headlined The Faces.
For the fans, check out Rod Stewart Sessions 1971-1998, a 60+ tracks of previously unreleased tracks that came out in October. An amazing collection in which Rod's unparalleled vocals are surrounded by rocker, blues, soul and acoustic tunes that have not been over-produced. Unfortunately most of his other music in the last 30 years has been over-produced...
Gold-I suppose I AM the hardcore who still follows closely looking for the morsel here and there, but I also think these gems are more common than the average rock music critic would know about because they stopped listening and its fashionable to slam Rod Stewart, and has been for 30 years.
bncquil IS correct--Sessions is full of these gems. The only complaing is probably could have been 3 disc instead of 4 as some of the tracks are merely Rod singing unfinsihed lyrics--most of these aren't that enjoyable. But the rest of the stuff is fantastic. Seriously, Sessions 1971-1998 looks to be tanking in sales in the US and that is a huge, huge shame......
If you notice from Foot Loose And Fancy Free,and blondes have more fun,theres what you need to veiw a total different singer.Rod sung one song ain"t love a bitch,and spin off of (early version)Fool for you,on Tonights The Night Lp.Some where in Ga. he was injured in a car crash,which is a rumor,which the Blondes have more fun was completed by ????.But included his last song ,ain't love a bitch.But he is alive.Rumor????
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