Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Creamtastic / Moving Pictures Complete: The Worst Band in World [Oh the Humility]
Posted by Adam Gold on Wed, Oct 14, 2009 at 9:07 AM
I've spent a lot of time on this here blog talking about what I consider "bad" music. And since I'm getting paid for this and you're not, my opinion is the last word for as long as I have your attention. (Just kidding, haha!) But seriously, I am a professional who takes pride in the responsibility of entertaining you at the expense of the musically challenged. Never do I feel better at my job than at a time like this: when I can expose you to something like Complete--a little band from Texas who, for one night in 1996, graced the television sets of anyone watching public access in the greater Dallas-Fort Worth area.
The series of videos featured in this post document the first and last performance by this "band." When I showed them to fellow Cream blogger Sean Maloney his reaction was, "It's better than Katy Perry." The logic being that it was less predictable. So far Maloney is the only person I've shown this to who can make it through an entire song--four or five of them in fact--which makes the band name ever so ironic. He was amazed. And why not? Complete are amazing.
Never in my life have I seen grown men--nay, ANYONE--wholeheartedly attempt to play music with such poor results. The sonic fruits of Complete's labor are so exceptionally bad and unmusical that they are truly one of the most unique bands I've ever heard. The most experimental noise band in the world ain't got shit on these guys. I went to a fucking jazz college and none of the arrhythmic, atonality-obsessed free jazz musicians I was surrounded by could ever hold a candle to Complete when it comes to creating something this "out"--that's jazzy geek-speak for unlistenable. And without all that insufferable pretension to boot. This shit is so jaw-droppingly bad and awesome simultaneously, it's truly hard to take. I dare you to listen to it.
PSA: If a jazz (or other) musician ever tells you he or she's going to play you a track that's "out," run for the hills. Even if you're in the plains, run for the hills. You are in for the longest 46 minutes (at least) of your life.
The band talking about working on the sound, being original and the search for a record deal.
These champions of dissonance, Complete, employ the use of a drummer who plays with no regard for time or structure, a bass player who plays with no regard for key and a singer who sings with no regard for pitch, all rounded out by a guitar player--the band's only near-competent musician--who plays a series of power chords, interspersed with pentatonic flourishes. With this raw group chemistry and these proficiency levels unprecedented in their nescience the band careen through cuts like "Hoogie-Boogie Land," "Dream-ing," "Beautiful Sunrises" and "Hot as Hell" with more reckless abandon than an ensemble of 4-year-olds (literally). In the process they haphazardly stumble upon a penetrating art brut. And to think--going by the interview clip posted above--it only took them a year of practicing to get there.
They may fail to impress the tough 1996 Texas roadhouse crowd, but magically succeed in putting on a performance that--thankfully immortalized on VHS--has finally achieved its destiny of being appreciated years later. Thank God for the Internet.
Reasonable people say that music is subjective. I'm not reasonable, I think there's some music that's absolutely good and other music that's absolutely bad. But even the most reasonable person would concede that, on the face of it, Complete are the worst band in the world. You might be able to find me another one as bad (doubtful) but definitely not worse. But when it comes to actually making something that gets my attention and entertains me, they're better than Aerosmith, Lenny Kravitz, Nickelback, Kid Rock and the DMB combined. And you know what? That's fucking beautiful.
Strengthen your musical tolerance by watching the videos below.
Comments (27)
Showing 1-27 of 27
Fucking Complete. So good. More here . . .
http://www.myspace.com/completefanpage
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Awesome! This would have been a perfect opening act for Wesley Willis. Also love the huge drumkit and only one thing being hit at a time.
You're probably waiting for this kind of response, so here it is...
First, i think these guys are really great in a Flipper/Shaggs kind of way. They're so consistent in their "badness" that you have to wonder if there's some underlying logic to the whole thing.
Second, as someone who DIDN'T go to jazz college, you're saying to avoid 'out' music at all costs and that it is unlistenable is still laughable to me. If you read your rock history closely, you'll see that it was the "out" sounds of Sun Ra, Archie Shepp, Albert Ayler, Cecil Taylor, later Coltrane, that inspired much of what we know as punk rock today: the stooges, the mc5, television, captain beefheart, and the list goes on and on...not to mention earlier bands like the Byrds, the Doors, Jefferson Airplane, Love, Santana, etc.. You know, in early 70's detroit, the mc5 and the stooges often shared bills with sun ra and other jazz groups. so, you might want to qualify your statement a bit. if we run for the hills anytime 'out' music is on display, then we might as well avoid the stooges 'l.a. blues,' which is a great example of out playing merging nicely with rock 'n' roll. Just because it doesn't suit the narrow confines of what YOU define as music or listenable, doesn't mean it didn't for a multitude of bands that went on to become legendary.
Made it 41 seconds. Although some of the guitar riffs in "Beautiful Sunrises" do sound oddly reminiscent of "In My Head" era Black Flag.
@freak out. I didn't say to avoid out music. I said to run for the hills if a Jazz musician asks you to listen to some of their own out music.
I agree with the Sad Truth. It's that unlistenable. Still, better than that time I saw Erase Errata.
I'd rather listen to out jazz than 3 chord garage punk. A least I might hear something unexpected. Then again, maybe Complete IS 3 chord garage out jazz... The interview is great: "all them initials are in that band name."
audio sounds like it could be from any henry rollins demo tape.
seriously though, these guys are not very good.
I was wondering if you guys had ever come across these cats. I found em a couple years back when I was bored and searched "behind the music". I got a 30 something minute (maybe more) video narrated by a dude down in Tejas who had a "run in" with Complete. It's side splittingly funny and a real staple among my friends. I highly recommend watching it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glHUMzfRoQA
The link is above, me buckos--awww yeeeah.
Enjoy!
This recording counts as a WMD: weapon of musical destruction. Now we know what a garbage disposal crossed with a vacuum cleaner would sound like if it attacked a sheep. The audience wasn't stunned into silence, they were stunned into poking their eardrums out with bar pretzels. Is there such thing as 'snuff' music? People watching this on TV ran to their basements thinking an air raid siren had gone off.
It's like.... danzig's "mother" meets captain beefheart meets the frogs meets 38 special??? my god. my.... god.
Also... this place called "Texas" is what created the comedy aesthetic of Mike Judge.
a friend of mine played hoogie boogie land for me last year. i watched it twice. it was awesome.
some youtube comments about "hoogie-boogie land":
"person a: try opening it any multiple tabs
person b: i thought that opened a portal to hell?
a: it depends on how many tabs you open"
"it's as if they never heard a song before"
Lumping together Flipper and the Shaggs? I must object! The Shaggs, frankly, were even worse than Complete. At least Complete manage something approaching a rhythm, or, if not a rhythm, at least a...pace, let's say. The Shaggs couldn't do that much. On the other hand Flipper could put together a perfectly good groove in their own way, at least on record (for all I know they might have been horrible live). Add interesting lyrics and a wash of noise and, for me, at least, you get pop music as easy to listen to as the Turtles.
I'm a big Stooges fan but I find "L.A. Blues" absolutely horrible. It serves a purpose, however--it defines a sort of abyss that the rest of "Fun House" hurtles carelessly towards while still sounding fantastic. That easily redeems it at some conceptual level.
I've listened to all of "Hoogie Boogie Land" and I might actually have enjoyed it if the title phrase didn't get so old so fast.
Complete is a great band - In the same way that "Glen or Glenda" is a great movie. I would rather pay to see these guys than to have to see HIBTB ever again. BTW, the Shaggs had more sincerity and heart than 99% of anything from Music Row; who cares about a steady beat, singing in tune, tuning your instruments, or even knowing how to play your instruments in the first place? Hell, even if the drummer was recording the drums in another town to an entirely different song doesn't mean they can't produce something worth listening to. Complete makes me ALMOST want to listen to Ornette Coleman (but I'll probably have to stick to Zorn). Thank you Adam Gold and Nashville Scene for writing about this band. You made my day.
I just discovered Complete last weekend, via YouTube. I agree - this band is able to grab my attention - and keep it - longer than any other band I've ever listened to. I don't know how to describe it, except that it's riveting. NOTE: They had a "reunion" show in 2008, with a different drummer and the singer now plays guitar (original guitarist quit - couldn't handle the criticism), and it's not as good. By that I mean that they sound more rehearsed, the drummer keeps time (sort of). In other words, it completely ruins the sound they had. Now they just sound like any other band that sucks. The old stuff was far better. Granted, they still suck, but not like THAT.
I'll say this, about Complete. They are terrible, clearly, but their heart is in the right place, and that registers a lot more with me. For that reason, they're better than a lot of music out there.
Listen to their interview... they are solely interested in playing 'original' music, and the irony in that is some kind of sign that there is a God. I'm convinced.
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