Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Not on My Watch: 10 Songs to Protest 'A Day Without Cats on the Internet'

Posted by Sean Maloney on Wed, Sep 9, 2009 at 10:09 AM

Back Alley Uproar: The alpha and omega of cat videos. Also, a very accurate description of evenings at the Maloney house.

If you follow this here blog, then you're familiar with my fondness for this here Internet and its wacky trends, or "memes" as the kids call them. I'm usually up for participating in whatever nuttiness the tubes can throw out. Also, I'm really into small fuzzy things, even when they crap in my bathtub. If you follow me on the Facebook, you know that I spend an inordinate amount of time posting cat videos because I'm far more of a loser than the Kingbilly fans think I am. Which is all to say that I am stridently against 'A Day Without Cats on the Internet'. My cat, Firefly, is also against it--in fact, she's rubbing her ass on the cable modem right now. She takes these things very personal.

Since this is a music blog, I decided that the only way to right this wrong and make up for the rest of the Interwebs slacking on this most vital of duties, was to present you with 10 killer tunes for the hepcat in all of us. We'll all start "feline groovy" after the jump.

Pantera -- "Cat Scratch Fever" Pantera meets the Aristo-Cats while covering the Nuge? This, ladies and gentleman, is why the Internet exists.

Rufus Thomas -- "Bear Cat" Thomas is one of the, if not the, coolest musicians to ever come out of Tennessee. Scope his response to Big Momma Thorton's "Hound Dog."

Shellac -- "Kittypants" It's an instrumental, so there's really not a lot to say. But it's named "Kittypants," which is awesome.

Jimmy Smith -- "The Cat" Composed by Lalo Schifrin just for Jimmy Smith, this is the essence of cool. See, cats are really effin' cool. Just come to grips with it, Internet.

Bent Fabric -- "Alley Cat" This is kind of an odd song, but editing a vocal version into the middle of it so you can show more pictures of your cat Falco with German-ish subtitles? Well, that's really odd. But it's thematically appropriate, so I'm runnin' with it.

Pee Wee King -- "Catty Town" Not surprisingly, there's quite a few rockabilly songs about cats. The rockabilly kids, er, um, cats, knew what's up.

Free Kitten -- "Surf's Up" Sure the video has, like, pictures of ducks and shit, but who's gonna complain about a little Free Kitten? Only an asshole, that's who.

Kitty Wells -- "There's Poison In Your Heart" This is a long distance dedication to anyone that thinks 'A Day on the Internet Without Cats' is a good idea.

Tifa -- "Kitty Police" The choreography. The cat. The thinly veiled vaginal reference. It's really just three minutes of awesome.

Presidents of the United States of America -- "Kitty" This song seemed a lot more clever when I was 14. This band should write a song about a juicy fruit that can stand in for a lady's anatomy.

EXTRA-SUPER-DUPER-META-BONUS VID:

Cat Stevens -- "Kitty" So meta the Internet is going to EXPLODE!!!

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Comments (9)

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this isn't going to keep the yolk off your car, sir.

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Posted by egg raid on mojo on September 9, 2009 at 10:19 AM

Do I have to hire the crew from Your Way Rental get all 'Higher Learning' on your ass? You don't wanna mess with Sugar, he might be little but he's a mean mofo when you get him going.

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Posted by Bawston Sean on September 9, 2009 at 11:10 AM

wow! not sure how i missed the kingbilly flameout-brilliant, Mr. Maloney, Mr. Sean. bravo! solid gold lolcat

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Posted by @: on September 9, 2009 at 11:21 AM

Kitty Police!
You have outdone yourself, sir.

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Posted by Cabbage Babble on September 9, 2009 at 12:27 PM

Resistance is futile.
Fluffy's Master Plan for World Domination by The Bobs.
From their 2000 album, COASTER, available at www.singers.com

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Posted by Brynne Whitney on September 9, 2009 at 5:14 PM

Clickie my link for my own protest to the "Day Without Cats" travesty.
Naturally, I had to interview my local internet kitty star, Samhain the Cat, for her views on this explosive issue.
She replied with interpretive dance.

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Posted by E. Brundige on September 9, 2009 at 5:42 PM

Once, I heard a song called "This Pussy Don't Eat Itself." I presume it was about how lucky we are that our house cats aren't cannibalistic.

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Posted by goose on September 9, 2009 at 9:46 PM

The Ballad of Daykitty by Lou Barlow, popped up on my Pandora a day late but I think it should get it's due.

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Posted by caitlin on September 10, 2009 at 9:35 AM

Not sure that this is true:), but thanks for a post.
Elcorin

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Posted by Elcorin on September 12, 2009 at 12:57 PM
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