Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Twelve 'Killer' Phil Spector Tracks

Posted by Adam Gold on Tue, Apr 14, 2009 at 10:01 AM

click to enlarge No photoshop could ever be funnier than this image.
  • No photoshop could ever be funnier than this image.
As you've likely heard by now, legendary producer Phil Spector was convicted yesterday of second degree murder. For some of us, this verdict is sure to forever add a dark sticky context to the "little symphonies for kids" with which he eternally changed the face of pop music. So now, as a tribute to a man who has just graduated from being the Fatty Arbuckle to the O.J. Simpson of pop music, I present to you my list of the 12 best Spector-produced tracks--one track for each juror who convicted him. Personally, I think these tracks alone are worth at least one human life. Hell, the entire Back to Mono collection is probably worth fighting a war over. In no particular order:

1. John Lennon, "Instant Karma (We All Shine On)"

"Instant Karma's gonna get you." Hey Phil, you just got got!

2. The Righteous Brothers, "You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin'"

You've lost that sweet smell of freedom is more like it. I think Phil will soon be learning about whole new kind of "lovin' feelin'" up in San Quentin.

3. The Crystals, "He Hit Me (It Felt Like a Kiss)"

Hit you? You're lucky he didn't shoot you.

4. Darlene Love/The Crystals, "He's a Rebel"

He IS a rebel--the murdering kind.

5. Ike and Tina Turner, "River Deep - Mountain High"

Is this in reference to the river he's about to go up? Spector is facing 18 to life. Sentencing is set for for May 29.

6. George Harrison, "What is Life?"

See No. 5.

7. The Teddy Bears, "To Know Him is to Love Him"

....And have him shoot you in the face.

8. The Ronettes, "Be My Baby"

Is that anything like being somebody's bitch?

9. The Ramones, "Rock 'n' Roll High School"

He just wanted to have some kicks. Apparently things got out of hand.

10. Curtis Lee, "Under the Moon of Love"

....There is a body.

11. The Alley Cats, "Puddin' 'n' Tain"

Bullet 'n' Brain.

12. The Crystals, "Da Doo Ron Ron"

Ba Bang You're Dead.

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Comments (7)

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It just goes to show you that when a crazy person spends 40 years waving guns around and threatening to shoot people in the face, evetually someone gets shot in the fucking face.

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Posted by Ashley on April 14, 2009 at 10:31 AM

LOL

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Posted by Pat Hundley on April 14, 2009 at 12:17 PM

Have you seen his booking shot? Ultra creepy awesome.
http://gawker.com/5210806/phil-spectors-booking-shot

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Posted by Bawston Sean on April 14, 2009 at 12:51 PM

Whoa, he looks like a creepy chinless Manilow.

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Posted by HighonLife on April 14, 2009 at 1:36 PM

The two alternate jurors
13. Bubba, "Phil, I love to meat you"
14. Bubba, "Spectocular! 5 feet 5, ain't that tight?"

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Posted by larry on April 14, 2009 at 3:57 PM

There was never any doubt (in my mind) that this nut shot a beautiful woman and killed her. I was glad to hear that he got his teeth knocked out in prison and got roughed up. I bet his misses his horrible wigs; he's not much of a looker anyway. He is right where he belongs.................Prison!

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Posted by Linda Loo on December 26, 2010 at 4:39 PM

When did he get his teeth knocked out? Better yet, where and by whom?
What prison is he in and for long? But w/o a doubt, whatever he
received, and where ever he is, he fucked up big time and deserves
to be in da joint!

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Posted by Stoney666 on January 4, 2011 at 1:38 AM
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