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Friday, February 13, 2009

Whatevs Valentine's Day Mix-and-Match: the Cream Gift Guide (Abridged)

Posted by Steve Haruch on Fri, Feb 13, 2009 at 6:06 AM

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I happen to think Valentine's Day is bullshit. But I'm also a hopeless romantic. And so can you!

In this week's Scene, our own D.P.R. lays out some basic guidelines for making an appropriately hot Valentine's mix, sure to inspire a session of hot doin' it. Think unicorns and Old Spice and subwoofers. Suggestions included. Of course, Cream readers can leave your fave love jams in the comments, or make a playlist on the Internets and post the link. Or, conversely, keep that shit to yourself. It's a special day for you and your bed buddy, after all.

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Got a dude in your life? On purpose? Buy him some beer! If you do the mix-and-match six-pack at Whole Foods or wherever, he's bound to at least like one of them. He was probably drunk the first time you made out, so this will be romantic, guaranteed.

Got a hot lady in your life? Make her one of these out of parts you can find at any old hardware store and watch. Things. Get. Even. Hotter. Great for hot chicks who smoke weed!

Skip the flowers, though. They're such a cliche anyway.

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Who's responsible for those "mood setting essentials"??? "Cry Me A River???" "How Insensitive???" Great songs, sure, but they're BREAK UP songs. And putting "Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon" on a mix is just weird... unless you're a pedophile.

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Posted by Darrin on 02/13/2009 at 3:13 PM

420 Girls!? WTF? Does smoking massive weed make your pubes fall out or something? I've never seen more slick-as-cheez-whiz snatches.

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Posted by fluffernutter on 02/15/2009 at 11:33 AM
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