Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Whatevs Hat Rock: A Nashville Concern
Posted by Emily Bartlett Hines on Tue, Jan 6, 2009 at 9:25 AM
Scene's year-end music poll, a prominent local man-about-town was moved to declare "fedoras" the year's worst trend. And on this very blog, the final half of the year saw a couple spirited discussions of "hat rock," defined by one commenter as a genre of music inspiring the dismissive response "Whoa, these dudes wear a lot of fancy hats."
Two thing are clear. Firstly, dudes are indeed wearing a lot of "fancy hats" (a term I will continue to use because it usefully distinguishes decorative hats from more utilitarian styles, including baseball caps and woolly winter headwarmers). Go to any rock club in town and you'll encounter hats in styles reminiscent of early twentieth century manhood. In addition to the fedora--a pliable felt hat distinguished by an oblong indentation at the crown, and "snap brim" which can be turned up jauntily (to horrible effect)--Nashville's stylish hangouts are plagued by the porkpie hat (a rounder, flatter felt hat, used to make the wearer look ska as hell) and the newsboy cap (a soft, flat cap with a stiff beak, calling to mind Dickensian ragamuffins). If this keeps up, we might start seeing homburgs, trilbys, bowlers, and even derbys.
And secondly, as I implied in my last paragraph, these hats are atrocious. Everyone who wears one looks like an insufferably smug, pretentious Fall Out Boy fan.
It's not immediately clear, though, why this should be. The logic behind the hat resurgence seems sound. Hats aren't intended to convey twattishness; instead, they're supposed to remind us of the more structured, pulled-together male fashions of an earlier era. They should suggest competence, maturity, respect for the self-sufficient men of one's grandfather's generation. Wearing a hat should be the equivalent of growing a beard, or putting on a coat and tie instead of a hoodie.
So why doesn't it work? Instead of looking like they're ready to "man up" and help Barack Obama fix America, how come fancy hat wearers look like dudes who forgot to vote because they spent the whole day getting artistic tattoos? I genuinely don't understand. Hat haters, I'm calling on you: What is it about the rock 'n' roll hat that's so bad? Hat fans, I am the most tolerant of women, so I want your viewpoint, too.
Comments (16)
Showing 1-16 of 16
Far be it from me to tell anyone their opinion is wrong, but...your opinion is wrong. Yes, most of the people who wear the hats don't know what they are doing and look like twats...but that is the case when they go hatless, too. Say what you will about him, Pete Doherty looks good in a "fancy" hat. I think it's all in the way you wear it. I tend to try to go for a dressed up look when I wear mine--at least suited up above the waist, tie and all. And never a porkpie, those are totally pants.
You look like a jackass if you're rocking a fedora with a t-shirt, but only loser Fall Out Boy-types do that, and obviously they are already prone to jackassery. Okay, so maybe I'm guilty now of doing the same thing you are doing...putting everybody in one big dumb box. Apologies to you, all you Fall Out Boy-loving losers. But zero points for you, Cream writer. Save your ire for all the baseball caps you see when you go out to see a band, in particular the backwards baseball cap. Nothing says "I like all kinds of music" (which basically means "I don't really like music") better than a backwards baseball hat. OK. Done ranting. Now I'm going to eject from this blog, because I know I'm about to get my, er, hat handed to me by all the miscreants and 8 year-olds who read it.
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I'm more interested in the notes and rhythms a rock'n'roll band is playing then what they are wearing.
I think hat wearers are funny (lookin') and generally add to my entertainment, whether they look like douches or not. Keep adding accessories, Nashville!
A hat wearer's perspective: Once the cold air hits I break out my stash of "fancy hats." I see the cold air as a dawn of celebration. So long to worrying about tans, skin blemishes, nice abs, scrawny legs and most importantly....hair products. Once winter hits I take a sabbatical from taking care of my hair, hence the hats. It's a carefree time of year and something a girl should look for in a guy during the winter. There's reason more babies are conceived during the winter.... you have to fill that hair doing time with something. Find me a man that's not more romantic during the winter while wearing a hat. He's not thinking about himself as much and thus has more time to think about his lady.
Granted, this doesn't cover everyone you're talking about. But it isn't just coincidence that this was written during the winter. Just chill out enjoy the hats. In a few months the hair dryers and pomade will return.
Oh, and why the fancy hats? Baseball caps have that big brim that's not necessary when the sun isn't in your eyes. Knit caps are too warm inside. The only other option are bandanas and if you hate fancy hats that much...just imagine what you'd write about a room full of bandanas. There's only so many syles of hats out there and what you see are those that have stood the test of time.
i don't have anything against hats. i just haven't found one that i don't look stupid in, and my hair grows long into some sideshow bob-ish whiteboy 'fro, so i just go to the handy dandy 3-guard and accept that i look like redneck coldplay.
I think the problem is the combination of the fancy hat from days of yore, with the generally sloppy haircuts of right now (hey!). It's kind of an anachronism, like if they found a lost Renoir and the subject was texting. Snappy hats go with snappy haircuts, and while I love floppy hair, it looks kind of retarded under fedora or what have you.
All that said, is my cloche okay? I bobbed my hair just so I could buy it.
easy enough. the hat is a douche trigger for one simple reason - 99% of most guy-about-town types still push the carefully crafted yet ostensibly disheveled look. this allows guys to claim apathy and retain dignity, though they are woefully devoid of either. but fancy hats break the fourth wall. one cannot don a fancy hat and still maintain a facade fashion indifference. you didn't accidentally put that thing on. you meant to.
you probably even bought it for yourself.
Fancy hats=trucker hats. Just another thing that the hipsters will embrace until the next trend comes along.
Who needs a hat when you can wear a bowtie? Bowties command instant respect. More importantly, they are difficult to tie correctly. My suggestion is for the Nashville hipsters to put a bowtie on next time you setup out the door in your wrinkle free button down and navy blue blazer. You'll thank me later.
i'm kind of hoping Chuck Bass single handedly brings back the bow tie.
I've been bitching about East Nashville's fedora dress code for a year or two now. but i've seen a few ladies who look totally adorable in them. maybe that makes me a douche too, but i'm sure that's no surprise to anyone.
i'm not really a hat guy. they don't really look right on me. except the $1.50 winter hats you get in the ladies dept. at wal mart i get to keep my head warm.
The fact of the matter is, you simply cannot wear a fedora (or any inane hat) without looking like a cock because:
a. The chubby ska kids who wore Hawaiian shirts and played with Zippos all the goddam time in high school have ruined them forever, forever, forever.
b. The era in which they could be legitimately and earnestly worn (without looking like a cock) is simply gone. It's over. Putting one on in 2009 is the most transparent thing in the worrrrrrrrrld.
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