No matter how many times I hear Zach Galakakakakalangalanglakanifis' "Who ate all the pussy?" jokes I giggle like a 14-year-old in a sex ed class. M.I.A. actually did show up, which was kind of a surprise. Word in the press tent was that she didn't realize that the 'Roo was in Tennessee when she announced her hiatus earlier this week. The Raconteurs are WAY better in a giant, drug-addled festival situation than they were at the Cannery Ballroom a couple months back, which wasn't really a surprise. And Chris Rock, maybe the funniest man to ever appear in a little film named Pootie Tang, had a rather brutal assessment of our current political situation, which was pretty fucking side splitting, but not nearly as funny as this:
HEE-larious. Metallica are gonna have to fart lightning bolts if they wanna make up for that Napster debacle, according to the punters here in Manchester. Or they'll just have to avoid every song they recorded after The Black Album, except for maybe that Thin Lizzy cover that goes, "Sim seema who's got da keys to da beema." Either way, their spray-on-hair-in-a-can is gonna have to work overtime to please these patchouli-stankin' fuckers. Plus, I spotted:
Heather Motherfuckin' Byrd!!! Between her and Beatle Bob I have totally quenched my thirst for pseudo-celebrities, so if I run into the Olsen Twins tonight my head is probably going to funking E-X-P-L-O-D-E.