Weekend Update 

♦ Country music’s foremost Messianic Jew, Tammy Faye Starlite, returns in big-haired glory to Nashville this Friday night for one show only. Rumor has it that Miss Starlite is really Tammy Lang, a former Guiding Light cast member and New York-based actress. Heathen talk. Miss Starlite is every bit as authentic a country performer as Faith Hill. So what if she punctuates her moral crusading with Tourette’s-like bursts of gynecological inflammation, or regales her audience with backhanded political anthems such as “God Has Lodged a Tenant in My Uterus.” She’d make a lively Opry guest, and that’s all that matters.

Backed by former Wilco drummer Ken Coomer, who probably finds her less of a diva than Jeff Tweedy, Miss Starlite brings her depraved monologues and risqué honkytonk tunes to 12th & Porter starting at 9 p.m. She replaces the previously announced headliner, Whild Peach, better known as Outkast’s backing band, who opted instead to appear on the Grammys. (Dudes, prioritize.) They’re expected to reschedule.

♦ Speaking of the Grammys, if somebody said, “Would you rather have this gold NARAS statuette or one of Chris Crofton’s discarded beer cans,” we’d have only one question: “Empty or full?” Over the past few years Crofton’s inebriated gutter folk has evolved into full-band garage raunch with the aid of his hard-driving Alcohol Stuntband. But you can compare his many moods this weekend, as Crofton plays solo 7 p.m. Friday at East Nashville’s cool new record store/performance space Top 5 Film & Music on Woodland Street. (The store needs all the support it can get, thanks to the meatheads who broke in before Christmas.) Then catch the Stuntband’s Saturday-night gig at the Mercy Lounge with The Clutters and Three and a Half Sisters.

—Jim Ridley

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