Web Sites of the Week 

This site is called "Guess the Dictator or Television Sit-Com Character." You pick someone from either of the two aforementioned categories, the site asks you a bunch of yes/no questions, and within a mind-bogglingly short amount of time, the site's software has figured out who your dictator or sitcom character is. Whoever designed the site has encyclopedic knowledge of television and world history, phenomenal software development skills and far too much time on his or her hands. And so, apparently do I, as I tested the site with about 10 different people, all of whom it guessed correctly within about 15 questions.

http://www.smalltime.com/dictator.html

Even in this age of sexual openness, when so few of us have inhibitions about sharing our innermost secrets with others we may hardly even know, we remain shy about asking our religious leaders certain questions. Questions like: 1) Am I allowed to masturbate? 2) What does the Holy Book say about anal sex? 3) Can I have oral sex with my spouse? (Answers below.)

Well, never fear, because the Grand Ayatollah Sayyid Ali Husaini Sistani (http://www.sistani.org/html/eng/main/index.php?page=4&part=1) is here! Sistani is the "moderate" Shiite leader in Iraq who has a tremendous following among Shiite Muslims there and elsewhere. With the uncanny ability to get along with political leaders of all stripes while never really coming right out and endorsing what they do (even Saddam usually left him alone), Sistani has established himself in the region as a sort of Muslim Billy Graham.

But Graham's Q&A Web site (http://www.billygraham.org/qna/) has a penchant for the mundane. Rev. Graham, should I get married? Rev. Graham, what's wrong with divorce? Rev. Graham, what's God's plan for me? Blah blah blah. Sistani, in contrast, has no fear; the man is ready for anything, including obscure inquiries about sea animals. Do you have a question for him? You would, you stinker you. Well then, just e-mail him (sistani@sistani.org) with whatever question is on your mind and you will receive an answer that bears the official seal of his holy office. If you're really lucky, he'll post your question on his site for all the world to see. It just doesn't get any better than that.

Answers:

1) No.

2) Anal sex is OK if the wife consents, but it is generally undesirable.

3) Oral sex is permissible provided that no liquid gets into the mouth.

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