Suspect Behavior
by Sarah Kelley
Beating traffic
Two sisters were traveling along Interstate 65 near downtown when a black Jeep Wrangler pulled up alongside their car and the driver honked to get their attention. When the women looked over, the male motorist lifted his pelvis with his genitals exposed. The perv then began masturbating as he stepped on the gas to keep up with the victims, according to police. As the driver exited from the interstate, the ladies took down his license plate, which eventually led police to arrest the 33-year-old driver and charge him with indecent exposure.
Making momma proud
Police responded to an Antioch home to arrest a man on an outstanding warrant and in the process encountered the guy’s belligerent brother, who told one of the cops to take off his badge and prepare to have his ass kicked. Despite warnings to simmer down, the 26-year-old perp further threatened to shove the cop’s badge up his ass. The man promptly was arrested for disorderly conduct, subsequently sharing a ride downtown with his brother.
Excessive frugality
A customer was browsing at Frugal MacDoogal liquor store on Division Street when he nabbed a half-gallon of Patron Tequila valued at $100 and attempted to leave without paying. An employee confronted the perp and a melee ensued, during which a marijuana pipe fell out of his pocket. The employee managed to detain the suspect, 45, until police arrived and charged him with theft, disorderly conduct and possession of drug paraphernalia. The man explained to officers that he took the pricey tequila for his own enjoyment and that he had no intention of selling it.
Ten cents a day is too much to pay
A spat over a lost library book turned heated when a woman threatened to clock her husband in the mouth if he didn’t locate the item. When a search of the house was unsuccessful, the 43-year-old woman followed through on her threat, knocking the victim’s glasses off his face. Police say she then picked up a “pink Disney play paddle” and began swatting her husband, who managed to escape the attack without serious injury. Officers responded to the couple’s Hermitage home and booked the suspect for domestic assault.
All items in Suspect Behavior are taken from actual Metro police arrest reports and affidavits.
