Oh no you di’int
A female suspect went ballistic after coming home to find “another woman at her house with her man,” according to police affidavits. An argument between the two ladies escalated, and the suspect “sprayed her in the face with some Mace.” The victim told police she then tried to flee, but the tirade continued outside where the lady of the house “threw a wooden shoe into her windshield, breaking it.” The assailant was charged with assault and vandalism.
Now that’s cold
A woman called police to report a milkshake in the face, and police not only responded, they actually arrested the 18-year-old suspect for tossing the frosty treat in her friend’s grill. The victim told police, “My mother and I dropped the defendant off at her residence after going shopping. When the defendant went into the house with an outfit that I had bought her, my mother told me that [she] had recently racked up a $300 phone bill on my mother’s phone. I went back inside to take back the outfit because she had done that.” And that’s when the suspect reportedly blew a gasket and chucked the shake, “causing soreness and stinging” in the victim’s eyes.
Never saw it coming
Police responded to a domestic disturbance call and instructed the victim to “describe the assault she had received.” The woman apparently thought it would be more effective to show them and she “took a step towards the officer and punched him with a closed fist,” causing “minor soreness” in the officer’s right upper chest area. “The defendant did not have any particular reason when asked why she had done what she did.” The hands-on demonstration landed the slugger in jail for assault.
Robbing Peter to smoke crack with Paul
A man swiped a donation jar from a gas station and, not surprisingly, only made it a few blocks before he was busted with the loot. “I was arriving at my work station…and I saw the [defendant] running out of the market carrying a donation jar,” said an officer who happened to be pulling into the police station located next door to the Sunrise Market on 26th Avenue North. When the perp was captured, he attempted to justify his shameful deed by stating that he’d been “smoking crack for several days straight and that he tried to steal the money so he and his friends could get high.”