Going to a goth night is really the only appropriate way to celebrate Black Friday, amiright? Sure, maybe there's a dearth of seasonally appropriate tunes — King Diamond's “No Presents for Christmas” is kind of a stretch, and we've been wishing to no avail for years that Ministry would record “Everyday is Hanukkah” — but who in the hell really wants to get jolly after a day spent in consumer hell, buying things for people you probably don't like anyway? Hell, since you probably spent six hours in traffic that backs up from Green Hills to Bellevue, most likely you just want to kill every slobbering fool in a sequined reindeer sweater. And we don't blame you. But to paraphrase the popular saying: Fuck shopping. Let's dance.