Quick Fix
The seller’s only motivation in repairing your new home is to do it cheap
by Walter Jowers
Last week, I offered a little advice on how to haggle-proof your negotiations when you’re buying or selling a house. This week, I’m going to drop some hints on dealing with the touchy end-game negotiations—the part of the deal when buyers, sellers and real estate agents get together and decide who’s going to pay to fix the problems that the home inspector found.
In most of the negotiations I’ve seen, buyers pressure sellers to fix things. Let’s say that the home inspector found a leak in the roof. Let’s say the leak is around the chimney. Leaks like these are about as common as ZZ Top beards at a motorcycle show, but there are very few people who know how to fix them right.
Anyhow, you can bet that the buyer will tell the seller that he wants that leak fixed before he moves in. And, you can bet that the seller will agree to get it fixed. The buyer gets a waterproof roof, and the seller gets his money at closing. It’s a win/win, right?
No. It’s a huge screw-up in the making. Here’s what usually happens: the seller hires the cheapest, dumbest sumbitch in town to fix the roof leak. Or worse, he tries to fix it himself. Either way, the person who ends up on the roof will lack the skill, knowledge and tools to fix the leak. Rather than do the job right, the poor soul will tear up shingles and metal until he understands that he’s hopelessly lost. Then he’ll bang shingles and metal back together as best he can, using one bad hammer and a brick for tools. For his big finish, he’ll top it off by squirting six tubes of caulk on the whole mess. The result will be a botched job that looks and works worse than Michael Jackson’s nose.
Sure, the buyer will get the repairs he asked for, but his roof will start leaking soon after he moves in, and the repair costs will be two or three times what they would’ve been if a good roofer had done the job in the first place.
You home buyers, listen to me: the last thing you want to do is put the seller in charge of repairs at your new house. The seller is the shortest of short-timers. He has no incentive to get the job done right, but every incentive to get the job done cheap. If you leave a repair job in the hands of the seller, you’ll end up with workers who are even less skilled than the barely skilled labor force that does most of the building and fixing in our part of the world.
I know, I know. Some of you are thinking, “So how do I get the roof fixed?” Here’s what you do: hire your own guy to fix the roof and get it fixed after you move in.
Most likely, the seller will agree to give you the money he was willing to spend on the half-ass job he was planning. Sure, you’ll have to spend some of your own money to get the job done right, but you’ll get to choose the roofer, check his references, maybe even look at some of his previous work. If he screws something up, you— not the long-gone seller—will be the guy holding the guarantee. That’s way better than having your roof guaranteed by somebody who lives in his truck.
Never agree to let the seller make do-it-himself repairs at the house you’re about to buy. It doesn’t matter if he built the place brick-by-brick all by himself. Don’t let him work on the house. Twenty years of experience tells me that do-it-themselves sellers always screw something up and never admit to any mistakes.
I should point out that some sellers (and some real estate agents) don’t like the negotiating strategies that I’m suggesting. Some sellers are so stingy, stubborn and sure of their negotiating skills that they’d rather start over with a new buyer than hand over any money to the buyer they already have. Some real estate agents have a stable of contractors who specialize in cheap, quick-fix jobs. Those contractors are mighty handy if your goal is to collect your commission check as fast as you can. (And to be fair to the hardworking real estate agents, who doesn’t want to get paid fast?)
If you run up against a stubborn seller who’s determined to be the boss of a quick-and-dirty fix-it job, I think it’s best to be flexible. Remember that the house you’re haggling over is going to be your house. Then ask yourself, “How much would it cost me to fix the mistakes of a quick-fix artist?” The answer is always “a whole lot more than it would cost to do the job right the first time.” If you have to reach into your own pocket to ensure that work gets done right, go ahead and reach. It’ll be worth it.
If you’re selling a house, you might want to ask yourself this question, “What’s it worth to me to not start all over with another buyer?”
I think it’s worth several thousand dollars. But don’t go by me. I won’t be selling my house anytime soon.
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