List
Fan Fair attendees packed Adelphia Coliseum this past weekend hoping to interact with their favorite country stars. The lines were longest at the following attractions:
♦ Sawyer Brown’s Mark Miller Gets All Sweaty and Flexes for Half an Hour
♦ Keith Urban Seductively Whispers Your Name in That Crazy Australian Accent
♦ Emergency Tank Top Sunburn Response Unit
♦ Faith Hill and Deana Carter Makeout Booth
♦ Vocal Sweetening and Audio Enhancement Seminar
♦ Have Your Picture Taken With Dwight Yoakam’s Pants
♦ Tracy Lawrence Shooting Gallery
♦ Try on Garth Brooks’ Headset
♦ Confederate Flag Folding Clinic
♦ Montgomery Gentry Processes Your Tennessee Driver’s License Application Regardless of Proper Documentation
Not everything about this year’s event was a success, however. Here are Fan Fair’s least popular attractions:
♦ RuPaul’s Country Extravaganza
♦ Wanda and Her Hidden Kazoo
♦ HeDAISY
♦ Al Berman, Periodontist to Music Row
♦ Dr. Nick Franklin Discusses His Bootleg Dale Earnhart Autopsy Photos
♦ Shania Twain and Le Petomane Perform Their Duets
♦ Johnny Paycheck Release Party for His New Single “Take This Autograph Request and Shove It”
♦ Señor Banjo
♦ LeAnn Rimes
♦ Hillbilli-Vanilli
—By Jonathan Harwell Jr.
