From bad manners to speculum trouble, readers share doctor horror stories
by Lindsay Ferrier
It was supposed to be a routine doctor's appointment. "I'm going to write a prescription for a hydrocortisone cream, and let's hope it knocks out your eczema," my dermatologist said. I sighed gratefully and looked down at my fingers, red and raw from all the scrubbing that came from caring for the world's most prolific infant pooper. "Because if it doesn't," the doctor continued, "it could be a sign of something far more serious."
With that, she snapped my chart shut and left the room, but her words continued to echo in my mind. Something far more serious. I felt my stomach begin to churn. Something FAR more serious.
As I drove home, I pictured the headline on my obituary. "Beloved Mother Dies of Eczema." Told husband days earlier itching was killing her, the subtitle would read. I stopped and picked up my prescription, but I was pretty sure it wouldn't do any good. It was time to say goodbye to my family, crawl into bed, and wait to die.
By the next day, though, my eczema was practically gone. The cream had done its job, so I reluctantly left my (quite comfortable) deathbed in order to rejoin the living and empty the dishwasher.
Everybody has a bad doctor story.
Mine generally involve doomsday doctors like the dermatologist, who mete out clinical descriptions that send me running to review my Last Will and Testament. But while my stories are bad, many of yours are far worse. I asked Suburban Turmoil blog readers for bad doctor stories and received a flood of email responses. The majority of them involved obstetricians and gynecologists, which isn't surprising. When hoo-has are involved, there are bound to be issues.
There was Marsha, who visited a gynecologist for the first time when she was a 14-year-old virgin.
"I told him I had difficult, painful periods," she wrote. "He begins to scream at me that I'm just one of those whoring teenagers who just wants him to give her birth control pills. Sobbing, I deny this. He then begins to shout at me, 'How many abortions have you had? I can tell by the condition of your *&#$ that you've had several!' He stalks out. I get dressed and leave and cry all the way home."
Traumatized, Marsha didn't go to a gynecologist again until she was married. She was relieved to learn from her new doctor that her girl bits were completely normal.
Then there was Sara, whose horror story started when her new young gynecologist couldn't remove the speculum after her annual exam was over.
"My doctor called a different doctor in who wiggled and messed with it," she recounted. "Then a nurse practitioner was called in, then a PA. After much wiggling, someone (at this point I don't know who, because I was staring at the ceiling praying for death) managed to get the damn thing unscrewed, closed and out of me. Everyone files out of the room, leaving just me and the doctor I had started out with. 'Well, that was...fun?' she says."
Reader Danny had the nerve to ask her new obstetrician a few questions about his delivery practices. His response was direct, to say the least. "I've delivered over 3,500 babies," he told her. "You don't call a plumber and then tell him how to turn the monkey wrench."
Okay then!
Pediatricians also ranked high on the list of complaints. One anonymous reader's story was simple:
"Twenty minutes after I had my only child, and learning, to my complete surprise, that he had Down syndrome, the staff pediatrician on call in the hospital (a stranger) looked at me as I was delivering the placenta and said, 'Well, you are 32, so you see why he has this,' " she wrote. "No words for the anger or horror."
Reader Lisa got the tackiest doctor award, for what happened after her mother suffered a debilitating stroke.
"The doctor came in and gave us the grim prognosis," she wrote. "Mom would probably not survive this; if she did, she would be an invalid, etc. Naturally, we were all upset, and grieving the loss of our mom.
"In a few minutes, the doctor comes back into the room, with a large box, filled with white purses of various styles. Then, the doctor announces that his store in town is having a 50 percent sale on purses, and he thought we might be interested."Now that, my friends, is a bad doctor.
Of course, there's a lesson here, and it's one I learned the hard way. If you don't like your doctor, get a new one.
Now that I have the world's most wonderful OB/GYN, I have to wonder why I wasted years going to one who had all the personality of an Old Navy mannequin. These days, my husband and I research doctors like we would any major investment. After all, the decision could eventually mean the difference between life and death. Or at least between a problem-free exam and one involving a speculum jammed in your nether lands.
I still get shivers just thinking about that one.
Read more Suburban Turmoil at www.suburbanturmoil.com.
Comments (12)
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Horrified. That is how I feel. I can't imagine what I would do if I had a bad Dr like this. I will say there is a mumbler at my Dr's practice that I try to advoid if possible. People really do need to trust their gut when it comes to choosing a Dr. hattahall.blogspot.com
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I am just appalled by these stories. Why isn't there somewhere to report this type of behavior in medical personnel? Horrible! We have to be our own advocates, because it is clear that giving one hundred dollars or more to a doctor's practice doesn't even guarentee you will get the exam you are paying for these days.
Yikes, and people laughed at me when I made a 2 hr drive back home just to see my old gyno. Well till I found one that came highly recommended here! Brittany www.bspeight.blogspot.com
I sort of feel for the dr who said 'that was ...fun'. I think she was trying to make the moment less of a big deal - perhaps easier to do when you haven't had a speculum jammed in your privates! I'm guessing they don't cover that at med school!
Luckily I've never had a horrible experience like some of these mentioned but seriously - do med students not get a lesson in compassion or at the very least, common sense??? www.april.aprilandmatt.com/blog
Two things strike me about this column. Number one, is, why haven't we heard more stories like this in the health care debate? Maybe we don't want to pit "the people" against "doctors," but honestly, these stories are so horrifying! The second thing is, where are we at as a society when we put up with doctors like this! Bad doctors need to be reported! I guess what I'm saying is, I feel called to action!
In my excitement about being called to action, I forgot to post: http://jacoblawrencenewman.blogspot.com/
And I thought I had had bad doctors. I am pretty good at standing up for myself at MY doctors, but I suck at standing up to my daughters pediatrician....I always wonder if he is right, he is the one with the medical degree... www.brookeblogsthis.blogspot.com
O.K. if I already posted this sorry...I hit post and everthing just went away. I can't beleive these doctors! Who do they think they are. I'll admit while I am pretty good at standing up for myself at MY doctor, I suck at standing up to my pediatrician. I feel as if I must take his advice because its my child and he has the medical degree and well a 1 year old can't tell me what she thinks yet.. www.brookeblogsthis.blogspot.com
These stories are just horrible, but in many ways really drive home the fact that doctors are just humans. Some are rude and pathetic. We choose our friends wisely, weeding out the rude and pathetic ones. So yeah, we should be just as prudent in choosing our doctors.
YUP-we all have them this is mine: given wrong meds-died twice-saved-doc was like "I should have checked for toxicty.-my vision is impaired for life-but I am alive..wonders of wonders! :) One doc worked on wrong "part" of the body -with "how dare you question me" one surgeon: total nutcase going into surgery-I roled off table-doc was furious-I told him when he got HIS meds straight well---all in operating room CHEERED-think his um "drugs" were not exactly legal- he lost his ability to practice in TN dentist-tooks his own meds-lost his license-I had to pay a FORTUNE to redo ALL teeth- another doc- gave meds-had them refilled -I then showed signs of some sort of "problem"-the doc" "Oh no I would never give anyone TWO doses of meds..I was an idiot for suggesting-the Pharmacy sent a copy of his SIGNED refill-now who is the idiot?, I asked... One doc sent a bill for $200 "late fee"-I was in wrong office and stated I would RUN to his only being "5" mins late-refused to see me--charged $200-I then charged him for my time and requested to meet in court-- My advice-treat the docs as people-not "doctors" be nice-ask questions-if they get offended then they are NOT the right docs. Most important= be your own advocate-do not forget to do your own research- and don't fail to rmember that if you stand up for yourself- you will be helping others. I was willing to go to any court regarding the "late" fee, when I found out this was his practice--I thought about elders who might have to make a decision "food/meds/life" or a $200 outragoeus "late fee"...STAND UP---right is right----use your energy to stop this behaviour by doctors---I could go on but...:)
I want to warn people that what has been told by these people is not only true, but can get much much worse if you don't stand up for yourself! I have been subjected to MD!S that have withheld proper care when I was desperately ill not just once, but I have been put in this position 4 X,s in the last 2 and 1/2 years. I have lived with fear not knowing that my condition was related to my heart and the MD's chose not to tell me about the condition until, by mistake I recieved blood works report that my valves were leaking. This explains why I have had problems with my heart failure fluid overload and 3+ pitting edema for past 8 months. We as patients have a right to be treated better than what we are these days! If you can't choose to be more involved in your care than we are allowed these days we as a group are going to find our selves at the mercy of a medical community that is allowing such MD's as these to practice with no way to keep check on how they are maintaining their patient care. lrtr
