Former Tennessee senator and once Washington lobbyist — positions likely held as method acting exercises for future film and television roles — Fred Thompson may have prevailed as Tennessee’s Great White Nope in his 2008 bid for the Oval Office, but don't say it didn't rejuvenate his presence on the Nash-ional stage. These days you can find Thompson on the FM airwaves, where the politician-turned-character-actor-turned-politician-turned-pundit’s daily talk radio program is every Tennessee Teabagger’s talk-radio pity-fuck. Try as he might, Thompson just can't muster the manufactured outrage over President Obama’s totalitarian takeover of the federal government and socialist pile-drive of the dollar with the same psychotic inanity of a Glenn Beck or xenophobic gusto of a Rush Limbaugh. Unless he packs on another 100 pounds and learns how to cry on cue, he’ll continue to persist as the Wilford Brimley of the angry airwaves. While Thompson’s lack of commitment is the stuff of legend, it hasn’t stopped him from penning a memoir. The folksily titled Teaching the Pig to Dance shows Thompson telling folksy tales of how the folksy values instilled by a childhood in folksy Lawrenceburg, Tenn., led him from the Senate to the silver screen and back. Pick it up on tape if you’re having a hard time finding chloroform or Quaaludes. Assuming he doesn’t bail on his book tour after hitting South Carolina, Thompson will presumably race his red pick-up truck through Green Hills traffic to sign copies of TTPTD for the faithful at Davis-Kidd.