Oh sweet Lord, we could handle a long walk across frozen tundra right about now. We love summer, but we’ve had fans and air conditioners melting down like gelato on a Milanese sidewalk lately, and we’d rather just skip the whole freon thing altogether. Nothing against chlorofluorocarbons, we’re just cheap and lazy and will bust a nut if we have to carry another air conditioner this summer. They’re heavy and we only like heavy when it’s blastin’ out of our stereo — like, say, Across Tundras’ Old World Wanderer LP. The local outfit’s sludgy Southern metal is perfect for a sweat-drenched night of getting real stoned and moving reeeeaaaally slowly, so as not to generate any more body heat than necessary. If they revved it up any harder, shit, we might as well buy a new air conditioner.