As the elections are finally winding down with this week’s runoff, few people could be optimistic about the state of democracy in Davidson County. The candidates for Metro Council have included two would-be politicians who have shot and killed people, a serial bouncer of bad checks, a former council member who operated an illegal dump and landfill and an incumbent who tried to name a street after himself. So here’s our advice: If any news story about your candidacy would include the following passages or phrases, don’t run for higher office.
♦ “He was forced to settle out of court for an undisclosed amount.”
♦ “The challenger opposes the public posting of the Ten Commandments due to a philosophical disagreement with the sixth one: 'Thou Shall Not Kill.’ ”
♦ “The candidate claimed that she looked a lot older than 16.”
♦ “According to his seventh divorce settlement...”
♦ “Forced out of office after admitting to a pair of shoplifting charges...”
♦ “The candidate, who promised not to raise taxes in her first term, promised that if elected she’d work to establish a new youth center, more police protection, higher pay for teachers and a new retractable dome for the Titans.”
♦ “In the ’70s, he once bragged to a porn mag about gang-banging a body builder at a gym.”
♦ “The challenger, who has been married five times, opposes legislation to protect gay workers because he believes it violates basic family values.”
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