

Instructions for Giftee:
1. Attach the cardboard Jordan to a train set
2. Close the curtains and turn on the lights
3. Put on a little Brenda Lee
4. Enjoy your Home Alone-style fake dance party
Perhaps later, invite some friends over to watch your fancy laser disc (the true Nostalgist already owns a laser disc player). Conversation topics can include "Trapped in the Closet," Michael Jordan's mustache, and the late Mel Blanc.
Ebay, Cut-Out; Ebay, Laserdisc

Justin Who-ber? Anyone who knows her onions about pop music is well aware that 1D is the next wave of the British Invasion, and these candles would be the perfect gift to add to her shrine.

Calvin and Hobbes is not only the best comic strip to ever exist, it's one of the best pop culture things to exist, full-stop. I strongly suggest buying this for a kid in your life who would really appreciate it: There are sardonic, good-hearted little bastards all over the place, and this will probably be their first exposure to one of the funniest, sweetest, best things ever created.
Amazon, $93.72
(on sale from $175.00!)

I have a problem with people who have a problem with Honey Boo-Boo. Yes, the show captured ill-bred American redneckery at its loudest, but 1. That family was actually a rather sweet family and 2. Here Comes Honey Boo-Boo was one of the best reality television shows I've ever seen. Like the first season of Project Runway, this show will go down as one of the highlights of the genre. Celebrate Alana and the rest of the clan with a Glitzy T-shirt.

A true comedy nerd should already own this book, so double-check. And obviously, this book doesn't go to the present day, though I doubt many people are clamoring for behind-the-scenes dirt on Kenan Thompson and Seth Meyers. (Fun SNL fact: While Chevy Chase is an infamous dickhead, at least he didn't refuse to act in sketches written by women like noted dead person John Belushi.)

I have an iPhone 4s, in case you were wondering.

Ke$ha gets it. It's pointless to compare her to other pop singers who aren't as fun about being ridiculous. Read this list of quotes from the book and tell me she's not in on the joke. Buy this for the trash culture fan in your life — you know, the person who likes to get drunk on cheap booze and rank Russ Meyer's films from best to worst.

People who like movies tend to like going to a movie theater to watch them. Why not give them something a little fancier than Fandango tickets? A membership to the Belcourt will not only support a local institution, it'll edify the shit out of your friend who can get cheaper tickets to cinema classics like, um, The Room (and others).

This is a thing where it used to be a big console but now it's handheld, like an iPad or LeapFrog. I used to be so good at Mortal Kombat, you guys. Liu Kang, and just Forward Forward High Kick your opponent into defeat.
(HT: Dave Paulson)
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