First of all, frankfurter? That doesn't sound American to me at all. Frankfurt is in goldurned Germany. Now a hamburger, now that's all-American. No, wait ...
Anyhoo, if you're going to competitively force-feed yourself some meat to celebrate the anniversary of our independence, why not make it some locally sourced Hillview Farm beef from Franklin that has been lovingly prepared by your friends at the Melrose Pub? Instead of gagging on a hot dog/tube of meat of indeterminate origin, I'd much prefer to gorge myself on a burger that is already acknowledged as one of the best in town. Well, actually five burgers.
The Melrose and New Belgium Beer invite you to put on your eatin' pants and enter their First Annual Local Beef Burger Eating Contest this Sunday, July 3, from 3 to 6 p.m. Contestants will gather on the outside patio to see who can be the fastest to devour all five of Melrose's specialty burgers on one bun in addition to a pint of New Belgium Beer. (Years ago, a few buddies and I engaged in what we called "The Krystal Challenge," which was a 10-bagger and a six-pack of Schaefer Light in less than an hour. The Melrose contest sounds so much better than that.)
The Melrose folks asked me if I would be a judge for the competition, and naturally I inquired as to what that entailed. They responded, "Make sure nobody cheats or throws up." Right in my skill set.
The person who eats all five burgers and finishes their pint of New Belgium first will be declared the winner and receive a $100 gift card to the Melrose. Second place will win a $50 gift card, and third place will win a $25 gift card, and all three will go home with a Melrose T-shirt as well. All patrons at the Melrose will have the chance to take advantage of beer specials from New Belgium.
The entry fee is $25 and space is limited, so if you want to sign up and take your chance at being the most patriotic person in Nashville on July 3, please visit the Melrose on Facebook or call 712-8160.