Thursday, June 25, 2009

Sometimes a Banana is Just a Banana...

Posted By on Thu, Jun 25, 2009 at 10:30 AM

...and sometimes food is just a meal. Not every meal has to be a transcendent dining experience. Occasionally you just need to get something in your gullet. But darn it, there are just some places that I go to because they're quick and easy.

As a follow up to my list of top 5 restaurants I've never eaten at here is:

Top 5 Restaurants I'm Embarrassed that I Eat at WAY Too Often

  1. Subway -- In my defense, I try to ride the bus to work at least once per week. Is it cheaper to ride the bus? No. I drive a hybrid. Is it faster to ride the bus? No. It takes about three times as long. The way I figure it, I live a block from a bus stop and I work a block from a bus stop. If I can't make it work, nobody can. So on days that I am carless, I look for a meal within walking distance of my office. Subway fits that bill. It also has the distinction that no matter what type of sandwich you order or what toppings you request, your burps an hour later will taste exactly the same every time. Ugh.
  2. Hardee's -- The other fine dining establishment within perambulation range of my office. Nothing can undo a week's worth of good work at the YMCA like a Thickburger combo. I definitely need to work on my won't power.
  3. Las Palmas -- It's fast, dependable and predictable, and the servers wear those really cool oven mitts that go all the way up to their armpits. I envision that there are five vats in the kitchen marked chicken, beef, beans, cheese and rice. The rest is permutations and combinations. Also, their house margarita tastes like Gatorade mixed with tequila. It reminds me of college.
  4. The Sportsman's Grille -- What can I say? I used to be at the Grille in Hillsboro Village so often that I considered forwarding my mail there for convenience. Everybody needs a place where everybody knows their name, even if those names are nicknames like "Aggro Jay" and "One-eyed Richard" and "S-getti Dave" and "Crazy Gold Hat Guy." Trust me, I didn't go for the deep-fried German food and BBQ menu.
  5. Arby's -- I can't help myself. A Beef and Cheddar with curly fries is my go-to comfort food meal. Who cares if Arby's roast beef is to meat as particle board is to mahogany? Sometimes you just gotta have one. When I have finally shed my mortal coil, there's a good chance that my autopsy will indicate an abnormally high cheddar content in my arteries.

Trust me, revelation is liberating. What are your guilty pleasures?

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