Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Coffee Filter / Foods / Retail Bring Me the Head of Tiramisu-Flavor Coffeemate's Developer
Posted by Nicki Wood on Tue, Mar 3, 2009 at 11:30 AM
Anyone recall the headline from The Onion a couple of years back, "Area Man Not Afraid to Try New Snacks"? That's me and coffee products.
One recent purchase left me with buyer's remorse. Tiramisu equals sponge cake fingers, cream, chocolate and coffee, right? No cherry, right? Then why does tiramisu Coffeemate taste like cherries and only cherries? Or, rather, artificial cherries.
Like the character in Apocalypse Now who says "Never get off the f***ing boat. Never get off the f***ing boat," I'm leaving the Coffeemate in the door to remind me to quit experimenting.
What's the white elephant in your cabinet or fridge? And have you ever foisted off an unfortunate purchase in a food drive?
Comments (9)
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Maybe they were playing a brand of "Recipe Free Association" and went from Tiramisu to its sometimes ingredient alcohol amaretto to the mixed drink Amaretto Cherry?
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When the DogDoc and I went on our first grocery shopping trip to stock up the pantry in our first apartment, I made us buy a can of Armour "Potted Meat Food Product" so that we could never bitch that there was no food in the house. At least there was always PMFP.
That can followed us through three moves and almost a decade. Then it finally went in the food drive bin at work under cover of darkness. I figure I'll probably be forced to eat it in a fallout shelter someday...
Some time ago, I finally threw away a bag of dried nectarines. I really liked the first few bags, but never got around to that last one. By the time I did, I discovered I'd had it since 2000. Which means it moved with me from Nashville to Memphis and back to Nashville. And was no good.
When I lived in California, you always had a nebulous stash of odd and unwanted food items vicariously labeled your emergency earthquake supplies. When in doubt, you did not throw it out, you figured, well, when I'm on day 4 of no infrastructure, this will probably taste pretty good.
I can't tell you how many cans of evap and condensed milk I found in my pantry when packing to move here. I think I must have thought they would be like found gold for anyone with children at that point. I don't know if it was evidence of a hero complex or a crude get rich quick scheme. Now I hoard odd canned goods for ice storms, and the annual postal carrier's food drive derives the lone global warming benefit.
I'm in an inexorable cycle of purchasing black beans whenever they go on sale and then remembering that my husband hates black beans, so I give them to the food drive, along with all the black-eye peas I don't eat on Jan. 1.
I just recently pitched 4 bags of festive drink and/or dip mixes. You know, the cutesy kind they sell at TJMaxx that come with the mini whisk attached? After years of sitting in my pantry, I finally said goodbye...to the mixes, but not the mini whisks!
I gave up fake sugar about a year ago. I couldn't beleive how many little Crystal Lite tubs I had lurking in the back of my pantry. I wouldn't pass that poison on to anyone.
My mystery pantry item is this enormous collection of little packets of stuff that you add to a bottle of water. Peach flavored. I have no idea where they came from but there are a LOT of them.
I've got the problem of not having any sense of my current pantry inventory before going to the store. Usually if it's on sale and I like the product, I buy it. Last time I checked, I had 9 jars of pasta sauce...some dating back to 2005. Also I have at least 5 big bags of M&M's from various holiday seasons (Easter, Halloween, V-Day and XMAS).
Oh, and a jar of Trader Joe's Almond Butter keeps following me around. It serves as a reminder that food photos in magazines can be very deceiving. It looked so good on some fresh green apple slices, but not so much when I tried it.
